Friend of Julie: What Size Do You Want to Be?

In the group sessions with Julie, she asks each of us "what size do you want to be?" The answer to that question helps us to visualize how we want to look when we reach our ideal size. The Key Hypnosis program isn't about numbers on the scale, it's about reaching our ideal size.

In the Garden, Thomas Wilmer Dewing, 1892-94
Photo by Theresa, at the National Portrait Gallery, Washington, DC

In a recent comment, Anonymous wrote that she was not able to visualize the size she wants to be. You are not alone in feeling this way. I've heard this from others and I too had a hard time with a definitive number.

In my first Key Hypnosis session, sitting in my size 32's in the chair next to Julie, she turned to me and said "Tell me how you heard about us, what size you want to be, and how much weight do you want to lose."

Since it was my first session and I was the first in the circle to speak, both questions came as a surprise to me. I took a deep breathe, and replied "I want to be a size 9/10 and I want to lose a 150 pounds".

The first part was easy to answer. I visualized my younger self in a sleeveless summer dress that I loved and it was a size 9/10. That answer came quickly. The second part was not so easy. It was painful to say in a room full of strangers. My first thought was to say "I want to lose 80 or 100 pounds", because I was embarrassed to admit how much weight I had to lose. Hello - have you looked in the mirror lately? My second thought was that if there was a place to be completely honest, this was the place. I wanted to be brutally honest because I wanted to be successful. It's still painful to say how much weight I want to lose, but not knowing how much I've lost comes in  handy when people ask how much weight I've lost. Since we don't weigh ourselves, I tell them how many sizes I've gone down.

I recently discovered 9/10 is a junior size and not a size I'll likely be wearing as an adult. What's important here is that I can visualize myself much smaller. When I realized I needed a new number, I started to say "I want to be a size 8 or 10". Today, a year later, sitting in my size 22's at my home computer, I am clear that I want to be a size 8.

Sometimes I get caught up in the numbers. There are times when I'm frustrated that by now I'm not in size 14's and by the fact that I have a long ways to go to size 8 or to lose 150 pounds. These kind of thoughts are obstacles between what I've done and what I want to achieve. Obstacles I can't afford to carry.

Then there are moments that help keep me on program. Such as the realization I had yesterday. I was in a crowd and I realized I no longer feel like a freak because of my body size; I blend in with the crowd. There are other moments too: like fitting into clothes I haven't worn in 15 years, feeling comfortable in my skin, having energy and flexibility I haven't had in decades, and being a runner once again.  It's great to have my doctor happy with my weight, this hasn't happened ever. Just to name a few.

One thing I know for sure, and Linda wrote about this in her recent  FYI post, the I last time wore size 22, I was not as curvaceous as I am today. Today I have a waist! When I'm a size 8, I may weigh more than the 142 pounds I was in my size 9/10 sleeveless summer dress. Hey, if I'm a size 8, who cares how much I weigh?

As far as visualizing what size we want to be, perhaps we can look for others who physically reflect our ideal size. I haven't done this, but when I read the comment from Anonymous, this was the first thought I had.

What do the rest of you do to help you visualize what size you want to be? What obstacles have you overcome to keep on program or what obstacles haven't you been able to overcome?