Friend of Julie: Eat When You're Hungry

You may want to lean in for some sage advice that helped these Key friends reach and maintain their goal size. The focus of this discussion is "Can I eat anything I want after maintenance?" The answer is the same if you're on maintenance or if you're in the weight loss phase of the program: eat when you're hungry - don't eat when you're not.

Both Chris and Jennifer on are on maintenance.

Chris

Can I eat "anything I want after maintenance?" I thought about this concept a few days ago. I realized that through the years I had lost the ability to eat correctly. As a baby, I only ate when I was hungry and I stopped when I was full. And I was full of determination when they tried to make me eat anything I didn't like. Growing up I always thought my mom was being mean when she wouldn't let us have snacks or soda all the time; she really was just being a good mom. For all my adult years I made up for that, eating what and when I wanted; using food mostly to stuff my feelings rather than nourish my body. The end result being a serious weight problem.

I see this program as a second chance to get back to that "baby" stage: eating when I'm truly hungry and stopping when I've had enough. Going back to using food as a "need," not a "want." Being a food addict, this was not an easy task. Throughout the years I really did try my hardest on each diet I set out on. The only success I've had is through Julie's program.

While there are many important aspects to this program, for me, eating when I'm hungry and not when I'm not, is the most important. When I can do this on a daily basis, I know I'm using food as it was intended. Then and only then, can I enjoy the occasional "want" food. I will never not be a food addict as food is my drug of choice. 

Chris before Key vs Summer 2013

Eva

Eating when I am hungry and not when I'm not is the most elusive and difficult part of this for me, because I think I really never learned to be connected enough to the internal sensation of my body, rather than what others thought it should look like. So that is the huge learning task, coming very late in life for me.

There have been some long periods while on this program where I ate only when I was truly hungry and I wasn't interested in food the rest of the time. But for the past six months or so, I have been eating much more than I should be as the result of any true physical hunger and it makes me unhappy.

But that truly is the most important part of it for me and I'm very grateful to receive this reminder from Chris, that I need to commit myself more deeply to that exploration, to my meditation practice which puts me in touch with my body and helps me to quiet enough in order to hear what it is saying to me.

Because I don't eat foods off the program I don't gain weight, or if I do it is very slight and then I take it off, and I'm not jerking my blood sugar around, so I feel much better than I used to, but I just don't want to end up feeling like I'm being hijacked by food, and that it is occupying so much of my consciousness.

Mediation is important for me, because if I'm not taking care of the level of arousal in my mind and body, then the thoughts and emotions get too loud and drown out the more subtle signals my body is trying to send me.

Jennifer 

I answered this question a long time ago when a key friend sought me out for advice. We spent time going back and forth discussing things. I was farther ahead on my journey than she was and at one point she asked me "will I ever eat 'normal' again?" My answer to that question turned into a blog post (Will I ever Eat Like a "Thin Person")...almost a year ago...and my answer still is the same...

I've come too far to let food take over again. I would rather say "no" to something and stand tall then to put my poor body through more shame, grief, frustration, sadness, suffering..all adjectives that I no longer want to put myself through. My life of eating whatever whenever is over. I eat like a "sane" person now - or this is my interpretation of a "sane" person and how they eat - those that have kept their weight in check and have never had a problem with cravings or food talking to them.

Am I perfect in my thoughts every day? Am I nice to my soul every day? No. Have I excluded negative talk more and more? Most certainly. I have many many days where I no longer think about eating, or what I am going to eat. I pack healthy meals for work, I don't give in to any of the shit there, most everyone in my life has stopped saying "Oh just this once, just have a piece.....it won't hurt you." My family has long ago figured out that I am still here, not starving myself, not doing some crazy fad diet (again), but really really working on being healthy.

I know my trigger foods, I will continue to work around them. I don't want them. I want to not want them. They aren't worth it. I enjoy what I can have. I honor my body and I love feeling "crave-free." This was a gift given to me by Julie. I walked into her place knowing I would forever be changed. I like who I changed into! I don't ever want to take advantage of this place that I am in, or what she did for me, or what I am doing for myself now.

"Can I eat anything I want after maintenance??"

No.

And I will forever be grateful to being able to answer that question that way.

Jennifer 2010 vs 2014