Good Evening to all my wonderful blogger friends......I have had thoughts running through my head the past few weeks as my hypnosis journey continues........Thoughts of maintenance.

I made my final size goal about 1 month ago. I started with Julie on June 2, 2011, age 44. I was a size 20. High blood pressure, pre-diabetes, a couch potato. I am a dental hygienist, and work was tough with all of my extra weight. I was a 2x. And depressed! Totally out of control. Taco Bell, McDonalds, Chinese buffet....You name it, I loved it. My girlfriend Sue found out about Julie, and started her journey in February 2011. By March, I wanted in!!!!!!!!!!! She looked totally fabulous, and felt even better. I would sit with her at work, and watch her eat-meat and vegetables, bite for bite. I thought, if she can do it, I can do it! And so I put myself on the waiting list, and waited. I didn't hesitate when the call came, and, 3 months later, I was sitting at Julies, totally open-minded to anything and everything she had to say. Totally willing. Never looked back! Soon after, the weight started coming off. Quickly. I had another refresher class in December, and I asked Julie to go down one more size. By February, I was into the size 6 Levis I had drooled for. I had done it!!!!!!!!!! I went to another refresher, and absorbed what was in front of me now-eat potato. Cut the veggies when I do, and increase meat. Now, sometimes it's 5 frenchfries, or 4 bites of mashed, or a couple of home fries. Very little. I still have very little appetite. I work out 2-3 times a week, still drink a ton of water, and wont dare touch any sugar. (Although, I ate out last night, and ordered BBQ wings-dripping in BBQ sauce. Today, no pangs, no increased hunger!!)

I guess I am putting this in writing because I am starting to believe that my body is going to accept this weight. I will do this for months to come. And I am okay with that. I still have no cravings, no desire for chocolate, cake, waffles, taco shells......I am truly blessed. Julie is a life-saver. Truly. I have let desire go. I am learning what it means to "eat to live". Powerful words for someone who has such early memories of eating and eating and eating. I watched my Grandmother Anita slowly die an early death from food. She weighed over 300 pounds when she was found dead in her apartment-probably the result of a stroke, or her heart just stopped, or diabetic complications. I never asked my mom. That was over 25 years ago. I want to be here for my children a lot longer than she was on the earth for her children and family.

So, here I am. On my weight loss journey. Letting go of the past. Embracing the future. Again, powerful stuff. I am on the list for another refresher in June. People state Julie doesn't want us dependent on her. I thought I was, but, now I know I am dependent on myself. My choices. My food purchases. My food decisions. I have learned to simply say "no thank you" and I stick with it. 10 months!!!!! 10 months of food not talking to me. Some of you will remember that I looked at my weight when I was at the Docs office. I forgave myself. And I have moved on. The number is no longer in my head. It no longer matters. Another number is in my head. And that is the one that counts. I am choked up as I write this. Still in disbelief. My maintenance journey is one I will be on forever. I am happy to watch all of us on this journey. I am honored to be a part of such a great group of people. Let what Julie has put in your head guide you. Eat when you are hungry, not when you are not. "I don't want to want it". More meat than vegetables. Nothing sweet! No labels! No scales! When in doubt, don't. They are all worth it. Each and every one. Peace! Sweet Peace! Peace to all of you.
To refresh or not to refresh? That is the question of the week. After the initial sessions with the Key Hypnosis Program, Julie offers "refresh" sessions to help us  stay on track, get back on track, and learn how to maintain weight. How often should one go in for a refresh? These are the topics posted this week and well worth with exploring.
Skunk Cabbage. Photo by Theresa.
Marcie asked if there's a secret to scheduling a refresher. Before I weigh in on this--congratulations Marcie for dropping eight sizes - that's incredible! You are a great example of how well the program works in the ideal situation - the initial three sessions and then on your own. It is my goal to continue this journey on my own as you have done, so I am excited to hear I too will be able to do this. One of the things I enjoy in the refresh classes is seeing people who have success on their own; especially hearing people say they've kept their weight off for years.

You are right, Julie said we shouldn't be dependent on her. She has also said her goal is to help those of us who need her help before bringing in more clients, which is why newbies now have such a long wait to start the program. I'm scheduled for a refresh later this week, and, based on what everyone has posted recently, I may get a call from the office any time now telling me I need to reschedule.

Mathematically this had to happen sooner or later. And here we are. Julie has an incredibly long list of people who want to go back and with only Julie to run a limited number of people per session (the room is small) and a limited number of sessions per day, it had to catch up with her at some point. I'm guessing that Julie knew this point would come too, which is why she found a new location, where she can see more people and where she can train others to help more of her clients.

There isn't a secret to scheduling a refresher session and they do not penalized people because they didn't go in for a refresh. I believe they are truly backlogged and your timing is such that right now it is nearly impossible to get in to see her. My experience has been that when they pass around the sheet to sign up for a refresh, I signed up for a call back for a refresh about three months out. Sometimes I called and asked for an earlier date and if they had a class that wasn't full, I was able to get in earlier. Other times, I could not get in sooner and I had to wait until they called me with a later date.

I am not aware of a "higher priority" list. I am as anonymous in the room as anyone else. The only reason Julie or her staff know I am the "blogger woman" is because I told them before the class started at my last session. I expect the next session I go to, they won't remember this about me, because they see so many clients. I don't have a special connections with Julie or her staff. When I was last in to see Julie, she offered to review the recipes on this blog, but she never replied to me about the ones I sent her. I wasn't surprised, because she already has a full-time job. Her intentions were good, but the reality is she doesn't have time to work with people in this way.

I have questioned myself about whether I need a refresh session. Am I being too dependent on Julie? Six months ago I planned to wait a year before I went in again, so I could learn to rely on myself more. That wasn't how it turned out, but this year I'm going to make my refresh dates further apart. By the sounds of things, since there is such a long wait list, this may be a good plan.

Thanks for your questions and sharing your experiences on this blog. This isn't a substitute for seeing Julie, but it is helpful having a place to share our journey. Keep up the good work everyone - at home and on this blog!

Support is a great thing to have in life, especially when working on a long-term goal. Having friends and family who support my weight-loss goal helps keep me strong on my journey. During this past year, I found support in a place I wasn't even looking - my local Deli!
Photo by Theresa
At my local deli, there are a group of people who support me by making panni's and wraps without the bread and they make them look beautiful too. When life gets really busy and I eat at the deli, instead of bringing my lunch, it's nice to know the cooks are on my side. I ask questions about the soup, (is there rice or potato in them?) and what's in this or that, and they never act like I'm a pest. They're great with complimenting me on my success too.

The support from people posting to this blog is great too, as is sharing our recipes. The cauliflower recipe sounds delicious! I haven't tried it, but I will see if I can fit it into my meal plan for the week. Linda, I hope you don't mind, I edited your post and embedded the video. I'm working my way through recent posts, to comment and add the new recipes to the recipe list page.

I made an incredible beef dish this weekend and I made a video along the way. I used my iPhone, but it's quite challenging to cook with a phone in one hand! I have many small clips that I need to stitch together and edit before I can post the video.

I may end up posting the recipe and a photo and adding the video in a few weeks, because my computer keeps freezing. I need to move files to an external hard drive and then I should be fine. It's time consuming to move so many files, but it's extremely slow trying to get anything done on my computer, including writing, which is another reason I haven't blogged much lately. I freed up some of my hard drive yesterday and that has made typing tolerable. 

Thanks everyone for sharing and supporting each other here. I love that you keep things moving even when I go silent! Thanks for that too.
Like many of you, I've had milestones on my weight loss journey this past year. I love Linda's story about crossing her legs in church. Quite a spiritual moment I'd say.
Juneau, AK. Photo by Theresa
My leg crossing moment was exciting for me too, but not as funny of a story. I was at the movies, sitting in the dark by myself. It was a moment that came and went and I didn't speak of it until now. Such a simple act, crossing and uncrossing my legs. It shouldn't take a gymnast to do this, but I feel like a gymnast because I can do this.

There were many more milestones like this. Taking my socks off without having to sit in a chair. Being able to untie my shoes without loosing my breathe or my balance. Fitting into the chair comfortably at the movies; no longer do I have to squeeze my body into the chair. Not needing an extension for my seat on the plane. Small things that mostly occurred without a big hoopla, but were indeed big moments for me. There were also milestones that I did lots of talking about too, such as hiking on my vacation in Alaska in June, taking up running in October, and running a 5k in December - just two months after I started running and twenty years after the last time I'd run at all.

A few days ago, I hit another big moment: I fit into size 20 Capri's that my friend Aime gave me in December, which were too tight for me then, but now fit me perfect. These Capri's zip up the front and are fitted at the waist: no more elastic waistlines for me! (This time a year ago, I had dropped from size 30/32 to 26/28.)

I discovered shorts and more Capri's in my "next size down closet" after putting those larger Capri's on two days in a row. Both days I looked in the mirror and laughed at how big they were on me. They were comfy like a pair of pajamas; the elastic was loose around the waist and the legs were baggy. They are now in my eBay closet.

This weekend I went through my 3 closets and the two remaining bins of smaller clothes. All the clothing bins are empty. One of my closets has only a handful of tee-shirts and a few hand-me-downs from Aime that almost fit. I pulled clothes that are too big for me now out of my middle closet; the middle closet now holds only clothes that fit me. My third closet, which I call my eBay closet, is really packed; I have more clothes in there than the other two closets combined.

I am excited to be a smaller size and I'm looking forward to the second half of this journey. I'm halfway to my goal size and with exercise a part of my life, the year ahead is looking good. While I'm talking about exercise, a brief story...

I've been working indoors on the treadmill for months now and now that the nice weather is here I had a big debate with myself about running outside instead of on the treadmill. I don't know what the big fuss was all about, but I got out of my own way and ran 2 miles outside with Aime. It was gorgeous outside and while I realize I run harder on the treadmill, it isn't just about running hard, it's about living life - it's so much more enjoyable to run outdoors! I think part of me wasn't ready to encounter my co-workers while running, which is of course ridiculous. I'm glad that I pushed through whatever that was and hit the trail by the lake.

I saw the posts asking about how often do people go for a refresh and thought I'd weigh in here. My approach to this program has been proactive. I scheduled refresh sessions so I could go in just before I left on vacations. I scheduled refresh sessions for about 3-4 months after each session, but I called to go in earlier if I felt I needed help sooner. I scheduled a refresh session ahead of the holidays to help me stay the course for the time leading up to and during the holidays (I went in Oct.) and I scheduled a session for late January. My time between session ranged from 8 to 12 weeks, based on what I needed to do to stay on program. I went to a total of 4 refresh sessions last year. I'm scheduled to see Julie later this week. My plan is to work the program and do this on my own, but I will continue to go in for sessions to see me through to my goal and once more to learn how to maintain my weight. I suspect I'll go 4 times this year as well.

Life is about keeping a balance and when we are thrown off-balance we can choose to adjust ourselves or get blown around like a palm tree in a hurricane. I've learned that adjusting is a better choice. I look for the rainbow in the storm and then paradise is found.
North Shore of Oahu. Photo by Theresa
Keeping balance in my life includes getting a good night's sleep, so I can start fresh again in the morning. For the past couple of weeks, my life has been full of work and home projects. At the end of the day, I was exhausted. As I walked up the stairs to my bedroom each night, I looked in my office at my computer and pondered "sleep or blog?" Sleep won out. I can only do so much in a day and sleep is key for me to maintain my balance.

I would love to say I've been so quiet on this blog because I've been away on vacation in Hawaii or visiting my friends in California, but that is not the case. In fact, I cancelled my vacation to Southern California, which was schedule for the end of this month, because there was so much was going on at one time.

During this storm, I continued to exercise and I never used food to help with the stress. It is only in reflecting back that I realized this - and this is big! It took a storm for me to see just how much I've changed. Now if that isn't paradise...

I have been following your posts and comments. Love the new recipes. Love the support you've given each other (and me).

One thread that has stayed in my mind is about someone who looked saw their weight on their chart at the doctors office. It's a challenge for us each time we go to the doctor. First you had to turn your head away to avoid seeing the number on the scale, then you had a sit and wait for the doctor with the number right there on your chart.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

Time slows down.

Your heart beats slower.

Your head goes in a million directions. Should I? No. Yes. No....

It isn't any easy thing to sit there all that time and not look. Okay, you looked. Now you know your weight. Yes, you agreed not to weigh yourself or look at the number at the doctors office, but how many other things did you do for yourself that day, this month, or in the past year were positive? Focusing on this one tiny error will toss you into a whirlwind and could toss you off-balance in other areas. Find your balance. Forgive yourself. Accept the lesson:  when you break a promise -- it is not worth the storm that follows.

We learn from our mistakes and the opportunity we have is to keep moving forward to find our balance again, to find our paradise. It's a much better of a place to be.
This cauliflower pizza crust recipe comes from our key-friend Jennifer. Be sure to top your pizza off with lots of protein.  I have not yet made this recipe, because I hear it can be tricky. Those who have been successful say it's wonderful and they make it on a regular basis.
Cauliflower pizza crust. Photo source: 12tomatoes
Cauliflower crust pizza with chicken.
Photo by Sharyn.
Ingredients
  • 4 cups raw cauliflower rice (about one medium head)
  • 1 egg, beaten
  • ⅓ cup soft goat cheese (chevre) or ricotta cheese (Parmesan or mozzarella work too)
  • 1 teaspoon dried oregano
  • pinch of salt
  • Pinch of cayenne pepper (optional)
Instructions
  1. Preheat your oven to 400F.
  2. To make the cauliflower rice, pulse batches of raw cauliflower florets in a food processor, until a rice-like texture is achieved.
  3. Fill a large pot with about an inch of water, and bring it to a boil. Add the "rice" and cover; let it cook for about 4-5 minutes. Drain into a fine-mesh strainer.
  4. THIS IS THE SECRET:
    Once you've strained the rice, let it cool and then transfer it to a clean, thin dishtowel. Wrap up the steamed rice in the dishtowel, twist it up, then SQUEEZE all the excess moisture out! It's amazing how much extra liquid will be released, which will leave you with a nice and dry pizza crust.
  5. In a large bowl, mix up your strained rice, beaten egg, goat cheese, and spices. (Don't be afraid to use your hands! You want it very well mixed.) It won't be like any pizza dough you've ever worked with, but don't worry-- it'll hold together!
  6. Press the dough out onto a baking sheet lined with greased parchment paper. (It's important that it's lined with parchment paper, or it will stick.) Keep the dough about ⅓" thick, and make the edges a little higher for a "crust" effect, if you like.
  7. Bake for 35-40 minutes at 400F. The crust should be firm, and golden brown when finished.
  8. Now's the time to add all your favorites-- sauce, a tiny bit of cheese, and any other toppings you like. See photo below of a cauliflower crust pizza topped with chicken.
  9. Return the pizza to the 400F oven, and bake an additional 5-10 minutes, just until the cheese is hot and bubbly.
  10. Slice and serve immediately!
Notes

Time-Saving Tip: I recommend making a double-batch of cauliflower pizza crusts--make one for now, and save one for later. After baking the crusts, wrap up the extra pizza crust in foil, and FREEZE it for a quick "frozen pizza" to enjoy another night! All you need to do is add toppings and bake at 400F, until the cheese is hot and bubbly.

Photo and original recipe source: 12tomatoes

Another key-friend shared 23 Insanely Clever Ways To Eat Cauliflower Instead of Carb, which is pretty amazing, but watch for non-key items in some of these dishes, as I haven't read them all. I just scrolled down the page and looked at the gorgeous food photos. I see that many of them have way too much cheese, so be careful with the cheese too!



Don't laugh at my non scale victory. For me, this is big! LOL! But don't laugh!!

I was sitting in church today and, (don't tell anyone) my mind was wandering (shhhhh) and I was noticing the ladies sitting around me. Young and old and they had their legs crossed.

I started an argument with myself in my mind (alright, I am sure I am not the only one who argues with themselves in their mind!!)

Can I? Should I try? What if I can't? Will I get discouraged? Will I look dumb if someone sees me try and I can't do it? What if I get stuck? (don't laugh)

I finally gave in and tried...

Guess what!!!

I CROSSED MY LEGS TODAY IN CHURCH!! and even better, I COULD UNCROSS THEM WITHOUT BEING A GYMNAST!!! so I will admit, for a few minutes in church I was crossing and uncrossing my legs and switching sides too! LOL. (ended up having to get a tape of the service to listen to at home, as my mind was occupied with other things) LOL.
Well, I am human. Surprise! And now I have to let my guilt go. I went to my doctor for a routine follow-up today, and had to get weighed. The girls in the office know that I am not supposed to know my weight, so there is no surprise when I turn my head. And they don't tell.
I am sitting with my APRN discussing this and that......my chart is open, and I think to myself-----9 months of not knowing what I weigh.....I am gonna look.....and......I look. Anyone else wanna cry with me?

On my drive home, I talk to myself about how it will be ok, continue on, persevere, you will be ok. Ho hum. Only time will tell. I just hope that my stupidity does not unravel the 9 wonderful months I have spent with Julie, and I must trust her and me. Well, I trust her, or else I wouldn't have gotten hypnotized! I have to trust that I am human, and one slip will not deter me.

Onward!!!!!!!

To work this afternoon, and to Zumba tonite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!