Today's post comes from our key friend Chrissie, who shares her perspective on maintenance and the afterlife. The afterlife is what many refer to life after reaching your goal size. Not giving up on yourself is key to reaching the afterlife.

This new lifestyle that we committed to isn’t easy. Losing was easy. Maintaining is hard. Let’s face it, we have (probably) all failed many times with other weight loss programs, and we’re seeing higher degrees of success with this one, so let’s celebrate that.

No, you are not a failure if you put on weight during and after completing maintenance. That’s what you’re supposed to do. The key is recognizing and reacting in a timely manner.

I suck at that. I always go to the point where my pants feel like they’re splitting me in two before I jump back into the river. I just so enjoy my wine and cocktails, and bread, and occasional bites of sweets… that become more and more in volume and frequency... that I delude myself into thinking that I can enjoy them without consequence. I deserve to enjoy them after all the hard work I did. WRONG. I can’t stay fit and healthy by repeating my failed patters of yesteryear.

My 3+ year maintenance pattern has been:

• Lose in the river for 2-3 months,
• Put it back on over the next 4-6 months,
• Start over.

If I could only react more quickly it would never be so hard. I refuse to think of this as failure though because each time, when I’ve made the commitment to myself, I have honored it without a single cheat - ever. And I've never been to a refresher. I am a stubborn woman who refuses to quit on myself. But I need to work on my reaction time.

I think that it’s important for each of us to stop thinking of ourselves as failures because we have to return to the river. That’s what we’re supposed to do. Julie said that she also returns 2-3 times/year, and she’s been at this for many years.

Losing weight is easy. Keeping it off is very hard. But I’m not giving up. Are you?

Chrissie you are an inspiration to the rest of us and thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience with us.

The afterlife is not just some far away dream, but it takes making the right choices to transform this dream into reality. Life is full of choices and we get to choose what our life looks and feels like. If your life feels like a black and white movie screen, perhaps it's time to make other choices to change your perspective.

March 23, 2016

I encountered a pivotal decision point in my weight loss journey today: continue to eat whatever I want or go back on my program. Each choice has a clear path. One will lead me to a size 30/32 and the other will lead me to a 10/12. The built-in default in not making a decision: return to 30/32.

Remembering my weight loss journey

Walking with one of my friends on Mount Tom this morning, she asked me what I'm doing about food these days. After mumbling something about not being sure and that I have a few ideas: get back on program or look at other options.

My friend stopped walking, turned toward me, looked me straight in the eyes, and quite seriously, but ever so gently, encouraged me to do WHATEVER it takes to turn things around or I'll end up where she is: heavier than she was before she lost her weight. She pointed to herself when she said that last part.

I felt the earth shake under my feet.

It was a hard place to be standing in her shoes or mine in that moment, but we both knew she was right; this conversation had to happen.

As I drove home, I ignored the many familiar voices calling out to me.

Pssst! Over here!

You can start later today!

Come on, just once more!"

Wait - where are you going? Why aren't you stopping?

I'm done. I'm not stopping for anything. I have food and coffee at home. No more sugar or junk food! I've had it. I'm on program right this moment!

I've been in seclusion most of the day. I've been looking through old photos, to remember where I've been these past five years and seeing where I really am today. Despite the fact that I feel like I'm a size 30/32, I am not!

I printed photos to have around the house so I don't forget where I've been. Looking through my photos, I remember how good I felt getting into this size. This is a setback—my journey is not over!

We can only change today. We get to choose what we do about food.

Today I know what I'm choosing.

How about you? What will you choose?

March 13, 2016

You know the drill: a voice in your head tells you, "You can eat this - you can start your diet tomorrow." You're strong on your program and you push away that voice. You do this because you know tomorrow never comes.

Tamarra - tells you to start your diet tomorrow.

Today I put a face and a name to that voice. Her name is Tamarra, which is pronounced in a wicked Rhode Island accent: Taa-maaa-Ra, as in "tomorrow never comes."

I encountered Tamarra this morning while reflecting back on the week I just spent in my head with Little Mean Girl and her sister Negative Nellie. In case you're wondering why were they were in my head for a week, it's because I put them in this five-minute video I created this week.

Before you press the play button, you should know the randomly assigned genre for my video submission to the Northampton Community TV 7-Day Film Sprint was B-Horror Film. B-horror means you can do all kinds of campy stuff. I aimed for more campy than scarey.

If the video doe not appear above, you may view it on YouTube: Going Off Program.

Last week when I went to the sprint kick-off, I had no idea Little Mean Girl or her sister Negative Nellie would end up in my video. They say it's easier to write about what you know, so it was a natural choice for me to write a script about those "voices" in my head that try to entice me to go off my eating program.

I had a blast making this video. After the sprint was over, I debated about adding in a few lines that were cut due to the 5 minute maximum length for this sprint, or fixing a few things here and there, or in the very least changing the title to GOP. Perhaps another time. I spent 80% of the last seven days focused on producing this video and it's time to move on.

March 10, 2016

I haven't made this recipe yet, but it looks delicious and easy to make.

Eggs in a Cloud

Ingredients

• 3 egg whites
• Dash of salt
• 1 oz. sliced Parmesan (optional, as cheese is not allowed during the weight loss phase)
• 2 slices bacon, chopped
• Chopped scallion
• 1 egg yolk

Instructions

Place egg whites in a bowl, and add salt. Beat with electric mixer until stiff, or until peak stands straight up when beaters are lifted.

On a parchment-paper-lined baking sheet, spread 2/3 of the egg white mixture, and make into a nest.

Top with Parmesan, bacon, scallion, and egg yolk.

Cover top with remaining egg white mixture, and smooth into a dome shape.

Bake in oven for 10 to 12 minutes at 350 °F.

Serve, and enjoy!

Source with video: Little Things.com

February 16, 2016

I've been struggling to stay on program. I do great and then I don't. To help me stay on my weight loss journey, I pull strength from a wide range of sources. What helped me stay on program recently are words of wisdom from Bob Harper, Julie Kibe, and Glinda the good witch.

Glinda and Dorothy

A few weeks ago there was a scene on the TV show The Biggest Loser where Bob asked the contestants what brought them there. During their discussion, Bob talked about the importance of believing in yourself and this dialogue followed:

Contestant: How can you fight for something you don’t believe in? 

Bob (speaking to all the contestants): There’s a demon in you and he’s a liar. He’s a liar feeding your head with all these negative thoughts. 

Contestant: I’m done with these demons.

"Me too!" I promised myself, "This demon has been lying to me and I'm done listening!"

One of our key friends recently asked me:

Do you think it's possible to lose Julie out of your head?

I responded with something I imagine Julie might say:

It was you all along – you took the weight off yourself; I just got you started.

This reminded me of something Glinda the good witch told Dorothy and is something for us to remember as well:

You've always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.
~ Glinda, The Wizard of Oz

We all have the power within us to do this program. The key is to keep coming back to what we know: this program works, but if we continue to go off course, it doesn't. The more we go off, the harder it is to get back and stay back. Keep coming back to the program.

Find wisdom where you can and use it to keep you on your journey. I've been at this for five years now and I'm never giving up. Don't you give up either!

You are capable of more than you know.
~ Glinda, The Wizard of Oz

February 14, 2016

This recipe for chicken zucchini poppers comes to us from Megan. She didn't have zucchini on hand, so she used green chopped cauliflower instead. Megan reheated them for breakfast with a side of ranch.

Chicken Zucchini Poppers reheated with a side of ranch.
Photo by Megan

Ingredients

• 1 lb. ground chicken breast
• 2 cups unpeeled grated zucchini
• 2-3 green onions, sliced
• 3-4 Tbsp minced cilantro
• 1 clove minced garlic
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/2 tsp pepper

Instructions

Mix ground chicken and remaining ingredients in large mixing bowl.

Grease a frying pan or skillet and with olive oil and set the burner to medium heat.

Spoon 8-10 nugget sized pieces from the bowl and place in the hot skillet.

Cook the chicken poppers for five minutes on each side.

Serve plain or with your favorite dip or sauce.

February 05, 2016

Do you have things distracting you and taking your focus away from your weight loss journey? Life is about more than achieving this one goal, but in order to reach our goal size, we must keep this goal in focus. I know this because I lost my focus.

Is your weight loss journey out of focus?

I lost my focus a few months ago and I find myself in a place I've never been before: off-program and all my clothes are tight.

At first it was just one sugary thing. A month later another. Over the holidays I went off completely. I was back on program for a few weeks and feeling great once again. Then BOOM! I went off program once more.

I'd forgotten about the vicious circle of self-promises to start again "tomorrow" and how that day doesn't come. After a night of indigestion, I wake up in the morning feeling lousy. The whole nine yards of physical issues that come with eating poorly are once again in my life. Some days I'm able to use feeling that way to get me through the day and I'm good for a week or so, but then I'm back in the infamous loop once more. 

I have not felt this way for five years and I've been beside myself with what to do.

Sigh.

Julie warned us this could happen. We discover we can "get away" with eating one thing, so we have a little more. We get away with that for a while too. Then one day, our "get of of jail" card expires with no notice. Suddenly we feel out of control with our food and our clothes are tight.

That's exactly how it happened to me. Of course, it didn't happen to me, this was all my choice. My behavior was equivalent to a when child learns the stove is hot and they know not to touch it again because they'll be hurt—I kept touching the stove—I chose to become numb the pain.

I don't want to be numb a moment longer.

This morning I realized I have been focusing more on what I'm doing wrong instead of what I'm doing right. I need to flip this equation around. I need to find my focus again and the only way to do this is to stop going numb; I must stop burning myself.

Today I began my day reading motivational articles to help me sharpen my focus. This morning I'll spend time in meditation and reflective writing, daily habits that I stopped when I went on vacation. Reflecting and learning encourage me stay focused on my goal.

I read an article this morning about motivation, If You Commit to Nothing, You’ll Be Distracted by Everything. The title of the article is inspiring and these words resonated with me:

"Never give up on a dream just because of the length of time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway." —H. Jackson Brown

I've been at this dream of reaching my goal size for five years and the reminder that time will pass anyway is exactly what I needed to hear today. The Serena Williams quote (below) also came at a good time for me.

I've allowed myself to be distracted by many things and in the process, I've lost my focus. Today I remove those distractions and regain my focus.

What about you? What's distracting you? Is it time to refocus and return to your weight loss journey? Today is a perfect time to find your focus.

It's not about how you win. It's about how well
you're able to come back when you're down.
—Serena Williams; Source: Master Class

January 23, 2016

A friend recently asked me what I would do if I gained all my weight back. I was afraid to even answer the question. I can't imagine what I would do. I'd be devastated. Over the holidays a plea for help came from someone who has gained all the weight they lost and is unsure as to where to go from here on their weight loss journey.

Theresa in summer of 2004 (30/32) versus summer of 2015 (14/16)

Here's the question:

I went to Julie about 4 years ago, did really well for me, and then gave up. I can't forgive myself or my terrible weight gain. At my heaviest and so sad. Work full-time now and can't afford to go back. Friends tell me it wouldn't help anyway because I am a "rule breaker" and hypnosis doesn't work for us.

What do you think?

—Anonymous

What I think is this: your weight loss journey is yours and only you can decide what you can and can not do. Your friends can't tell you how to resolve your food issues; only you can do this. Only you know what is possible and even this is questionable, as there are many times in life when each of us have far exceeded our own limits. You can do this if you really want to. You did it once and you can do it again.

That doesn't mean it will be easy, but if it was easy then none of us would have weight problems. We each need to learn to trust ourselves to eat the right foods and then repeat, repeat, repeat, until we are in our goal size and learn how to maintain that size.

As far as being a rule breaker, well what if you break the rule about being a rule breaker and become some one who doesn't break the rules?

Hypnosis may not work for your friends, but it worked for you. You can't go by what others believe possible for you. You must once again learn that you can trust yourself and your body. The fact that you did 'really well' on this program four years ago speaks volumes as to whether you can trust yourself or your body.

Okay, so you made a mistake or two and then things got out of control. Move on. Forgive yourself. Stop being so mean to yourself and let go of what you could have, should have, but didn't do, and move on. Yes, you can get your food cravings back in line. Yes, you can learn to trust yourself once again. Yes, you can do this.

Yesterday's post from Momomig, Elevated Status, said this about cravings:

Cravings are nothing more than a thought. You observe that a food would taste nice. Like you observe that a car is nice, that a hair color is pretty, that someone's home is lovely... you don't necessarily obtain that thing - you simply notice it and go about your life.

Can you do this on your own or do you need a refresher? I can't answer this and neither can anyone else. There are key-followers who report gaining back all their weight and then taking it off again all on their own. There are also those who gained the weight back and went for a refresher and found success that way. You get to choose here. You did it once, you can do it again, with or without the refresher. Dig deep and decide what will work for you.

As far as not being able to afford to go back for a refresher, sure it's not cheap, but junk food isn't cheap either. If I were to add up what I spent in a day on junk food and then multiply that out...well it all adds up to a lot of money and fast.

Do some math with me on this. I'll keep it simple by looking at just one junk food item I used to eat several times a week: ice cream. One container of Ben and Jerry's ice cream averages about $4.50. If I had 3 containers a week, that adds up to $54 a month. If I ate out at a fast food place 3 time a week I'd easily spend $10 a meal, which is another $120.

BOOM—$175 in a month on junk food! Easily. I'm sure it was even more.

Spending the money to go to a refresher is like spending money on medicine. You spend the money, but if you don't take the meds (follow the program) then you're not going to get better (drop your weight).

Go shopping and get the right foods in your house and start eating key-friendly foods now. You won't get in for a refresher until March at the earliest, so you have at least eight weeks before you can get in. This gives you two months to get yourself on program and if you feel like you still need help (a refresher), you'll have some time to save up money too.

You are not a bad or horrible person because you gained all your weight back. You are not a failure either. You aren't the only one this has happened to and while this may not make you feel any better, I hope that you find hope in knowing others have been where you are and they were able to reach their goal size once again.

Welcome back to the river (on program). I wish you well on your journey.

Here are some responses I've received for you...

Wise words indeed!

F.A.I.L. means first attempt in learning

Related:
Elevated Status

January 05, 2016