With all the special holiday foods on our tables at home and in the office, it's easy to feel deprived of all those foods we see our friends and family eating. I haven't felt deprived for most of my weight loss journey, but this holiday season--all kinds of sweet things are calling my name. Recently one of my key friends asked another key friend: how do you deal with feeling deprived? Her reply: I go buy a pound of shucked lobster with real butter! How deprived can this program be if we can eat lobster with melted butter?
I had this shucked lobster appetizer at Masses Seafood, Chicopee, MA.
Every year I go to a handful of holiday parties, but this year, I bowed out of two big parties that I've always enjoyed, because I didn't feel like I could deal with all those foods. Later, I felt sorry for myself that I was deprived of the parties. Sigh. This is crazy talking.

I went to one party because the food seemed easy enough for me to handle. Upfront I knew most of the foods would not be key-friendly, so I resolved I would go to the party, but I wouldn't eat anything. The party started at 3:30, and since I don't normally eat at that time of day, I figured how hard could this be? At the party, I found a few key foods and I ate them, but I felt deprived, because everyone was enjoying gluten-free cookies. Wah, wah, wah...why can't I at least have gluten-free cookies...? This is crazy talking.

I survived that party, but yesterday I was offered one of Ben's homemade cookies. It was like a watching a slow motion movie scene: a long shot of the big smile on his face,  zoom in on his arm stretching out to me, holding the container. . . focus on the container. . . zoom. . . zoom. . . pause, stop camera on a close up of cookies. This is crazy talking.

That was one of those killer days with lots of pressure. Those cookies would relieve me of the pressure right? Just one right? Sigh. This is crazy talking.

No, no, no. Tap, tap, tap. Walk away from the cookie jar. Step away from the crazy talk.

I've decided to just face it: this holiday season is harder for me than the previous two years on this program. Done. Deal with it. Tap, tap, tap. Walk away from the pity pot. Stop with the oh, poor me drama and focus on what this holiday season has to offer me that the other two seasons did not: vitality, high energy, and a desire to live my life with as much joy as possible.

What brings me joy is being full of enough energy to run around with my niece and her children after Thanksgiving dinner. Running in the 2013 Hot Chocolate 5k in Northampton (just over 3 miles) was  joyful too!

Wishing joy to all of you, through this holiday season and into the new year!

My niece and her children.
Dec. 2013 Hot Chocolate 5k Run Northampton
December 18, 2013
It's that time of year that many are cooking food to share at gathering with family and friends. For many, this means baking. I debated long and hard about baking for our family gathering coming up this weekend. But then I had a dream and that changed everything.
Meatballs are what's cooling in my kitchen. Photo by Theresa.
After waking from my dream, I decided I needed to be one of the people who bring real food to this gathering. I decided there will be enough people bringing baked goods and I didn't need to be one of them. I don't care if the baked goodies are store bought or homemade. Although 2 weeks ago, when I debated about what to bring, it seemed important to me that there be home baked items and I should be one of the people baking them.

Then I had my dream and I came to my senses.

I make really incredible meatballs, so that's what I decided to make. Last night I went to the store and  bought 6 pounds of beef and the other ingredients I needed.

This morning, I poured the first crock pot of cooked meatballs and sauce into the tin pan, and as they cooled, I began to make the next batch of meatballs. As I rolled the meatballs, I was happy about my decision to dice enough onions last night for this second batch. Crying over onions at 5am is not my ideal way to start a day.

I was also happy that I was rolling meatballs and not making cupcakes. Based on the amount of meatballs I was making, I could not imagine myself baking this many cupcakes. Yes, meatballs was a much better choice for me. Plus, I enjoyed having 3 meatballs this morning. Have I told you I make delicious meatballs? Yes, I do!

About that dream. I often have vivid recall of dreams. Some dreams I remember for years. This one I will remember for a while and it was definitely on my mind as I made my meatballs. Many people say when we are on this program and we dream about food, we're getting ready for a big drop in weight. I welcome such a drop!

The Dream


In my dream, I was making large amounts of cupcakes. I was done with all the baking and most of the cupcakes were beautifully frosted. With a spatula in hand, I picked up the next cupcake and then I froze.

Should I? Could I? Do I dare?

I was debating about eating just one.

I was debating about having just a taste of the frosting.

I decided for the later. I took a taste of the frosting. A really big taste.

Suddenly a strong wind blew into the room and within moments--the kitchen was a mess. Sprinkles started falling from the ceiling. Sprinkles, dry ingredients, and batter, were splashed on everything. The floor. Counter tops. The sink. The walls. My hair. My clothes.

I couldn't get away from the mess. Every step I took made more of a mess. My desire to eat just one cupcake or just a taste of frosting was gone. Everything looked disgusting to me. Standing in the middle of my kitchen and looking at the mess, I didn't know what to do next. Then I woke up.

What about you?

What's cooking in your kitchen this holiday season?

What are you doing to stay on program through the holidays?

What are you doing to assure this New Year's Eve, you will not need to resolve to lose weight in 2014, because your weight loss journey in already happening and 2014?

I say let's all join Jane and waltz into 2014 feeling the best we've felt in a long time!


12/12/13 update: Here's my meatball recipe, which I altered to make 6 pounds meatballs. Holy mole, that's a lot of meatballs! I made 3 pounds (1 package) at a time, and then made a second batch. My crockpot won't hold more than 3 pounds plus 1 84 oz jar of sauce. I also modified my recipe a bit; for three pounds of beef: I used 3 eggs, a nameless brand 84 oz jar of tomato sauce, added an entire bulb of fresh chopped garlic, and I added a package of (nameless brand) Italian Seasoning mix to the meat mixture. I think the whole prep time was about 45 minutes (per 3 pounds).


December 12, 2013
This week I had a chance to attend a refresher with Julie, and also met Molly. A double positive experience for me. I had been on the fence as to why I was going and if I really needed a refresher now. I started back in July and have had success on the program. As I have said on my other posts, I have a few times, gone in and out of the river. I feel pretty good, but knew I wasn't on the same strong path as I had been back in the summer, and I still had another size that I wanted to go down. So off I went on Monday afternoon. Let me just say that it was money and time well spent. Here is why:

As I looked around the room, you could see that this wasn't a beginner session, but it was a session of successful KH graduates. Some were at goal, others close. All were there because they needed to be there. We all needed a refresher.

Some folks had tried carbs, some sugar and others were at goal and afraid to go off. Julie assessed the room, asked a lot of questions and then proceeded to talk with us as to "Why" we were there.

Just like before, the 3 hours flew by. I left feeling powerful and invigorated. Knowing that, I have the tools to succeed.  Knowing that, when I am at goal, I know what to do, how to do it and follow the plan. Loose pants - 1 Potato at a meal/day, pants getting tighter.... Back to protein/veggies. Over and over.... Once successful, try another carb. STAY AWAY FROM SUGAR. This was drilled into my head.

I feel invigorated. I feel strong and I feel like I can waltz into 2014 feeling the best I have felt in a long time. knowing that my New Year's Resolution isn't going to be about weight.... Now it's going to be about maybe ... Exercise? Savings? Family? Vacation.... But surely not about my weight or pounds.

If you're on the fence about setting up a refresher, do it. I can say that I am very happy I did.

Happy Holidays,

Jane
December 11, 2013
Here's another Trader Joe's recipe. I'm on a roll here. This veggie dish looks delicious and would be perfect with any of your favorite meats.
Squash Carbonara

Cooking Time: 30 - 40 Minutes

Ingredients
  • 1/2 large Spaghetti Squash
  • 3 slices Bacon, cut into moderate-sized bits
  • 1 clove garlic, minced
  • 1/2 cup cream cheese, cubed
  • 3/4 cup peas (fresh or frozen)
  • 3/4 cup milk
  • 1/3 cup grated Parmesan Reggiano cheese

Cook the squash: 
  1. Use a sharp knife to cut squash in half lengthwise. 
  2. Use a large table spoon to scrape out the seeds and string. 
  3. Season with salt and pepper, place cut side up in a microwave safe dish and add about an inch of water to the bottom of the dish. 
  4. Cover dish with cling wrap and microwave on high for 8-10 minutes. 
  5. Allow to cool enough to handle before unwrapping. 
  6. Use a table fork to scrape squash from top to bottom to separate flesh into strands of "spaghetti." 
Prepare Sauce: 
  1. Cook bacon in large skillet until crisp. 
  2. Remove from skillet with slotted spoon and drain on a paper towel. 
  3. Pour off bacon drippings. 
  4. Add garlic to pan and sauté until opaque, about 1 minute. 
  5. Add milk, cream cheese and peas; simmer over very low heat until cream cheese is melted and mixture is well blended and heated through. 
  6. Add more milk if too thick. 
  7. Add squash and bacon; toss to coat. 
  8. Sprinkle on Parmesan cheese and serve right away.
December 09, 2013
This spicy roasted corn salad recipe comes from Trader Joe's. I've made something similar, but the feta cheese is a new addition for me.  I add beaten eggs to my corn mixture and it's quite yummy. I'm going to try it with feta. This is the perfect quick veggie to have with a nice piece of meat for dinner or with cold chicken at lunch.
Spicy Roasted Corn & Feta Salad

Ingredients:
  • 1 Tbsp TJ's Unsalted Butter
  • 1/2 cup diced TJ's Red Onion
  • 1 package TJ's Frozen Roasted Corn
  • 1/2 package Pastures of Eden Feta (green & yellow bag)
  • 1/4 cup chopped TJ's Organic Cilantro
  • 1/4 tsp TJ's Red Cayenne Pepper
  • 2 TJ's Limes
  • TJ's Pepper, to taste
Directions
  1. Melt butter in a large frying pan. 
  2. Saute diced onion for 2-3 minutes until it softens. 
  3. Add frozen corn and heat 6-7 minutes, until warm. 
  4. Chop half of the package of feta into small crumbles, it should be about 1 cup. 
  5. Add feta, cilantro, cayenne pepper and the juice of two limes, to the corn and stir. 
  6. Add pepper to taste. 
  7. Serve warm. 
Recipe and photo source: Trader Joe's
December 09, 2013
While organizing photos on my new iMac last week, I found photos from a conference I went to this past October. As I looked at the photos, I realized how much more fun this year's conference was vs the one I went to in 2010. For starters, I'm half the size I was in 2010. I'm also far more mobile than I was in 2010. I remember how exhausted I was walking from my hotel room to the conference in 2010. At this year's conference, I went to Niagara Falls twice and walked for hours both times.
2013 vs 2010
Three years ago when I went to this conference, I ate EVERYTHING they served. Everything at the buffet table. Every snack. Every dessert. Let me be clear here: I didn't eat just one snack and one dessert, I ate one of each snack and one of every dessert. Plus I stuffed my purse with snacks and ate them when I was alone in my hotel room each night. Every night I was so full my stomach ached.

Looking back, I'm so embarrassed at how obsessed I was with food, how I had no shame about the quantities of food I ate in public (and alone), or that I was stuffing my purse with treats for later. I thought everyone else was nuts because they weren't indulging this way too.

At this year's conference I had a blast. Mind you, I really enjoyed myself in 2010, but I was exhausted all the time because I was constantly loading up on sugar. This year I walked between the hotel and the conference with great enthusiasm because each step added to my FitBit goals. I went to the gym 3 of the 5 mornings I was there and I walked rather than taking the bus to our nightly excursions.

Before I left for this year's conference I debated about whether to bring food with me. I was going to be there for a full week, so it seemed a bit much to pack my own food. My final decision was not to bring food. I decided this would be a great opportunity for me to continue to learn how to work the program outside my home. Plus, if I needed to, I could leave the conference and buy food nearby.

The conference meals were full of key friendly-foods. There were a lot of foods that were not on program, including snacks and desserts. I focused on foods I can eat. And guess what - there were 2-3 meat dishes served at every meal. When snacks were served, I had coffee or water and spent time talking to others rather than indulging in sugar.

One shortcoming was that I didn't think about the trip home. I joined co-workers in a van and after the morning breakfast stop we didn't stop except for gas all the way back. I was pretty hungry by the time I got home, because I didn't eat breakfast with the others (I wasn't hungry) and I refused to pay $9.99 for a $4.99 bag of beef jerky at the rest stops. Next time, I will pack a bag of jerky for the road.  But I made it home and I did not starve to death.

We always have choices. When you go to your next conference or vacation, think about how you want your life to be: full of sugar and empty on energy, or full of energy and eating on program. You have free will, so you get to choose. I'm happy I chose to stay on program.

What about you? I'd love to hear about your conference experience and how you stayed on program!
December 07, 2013
If you're one of those people with an obsession for buffalo wings, this recipe may be just what you need to help you change your repertoire. This recipe gives a whole new twist to buffalo chicken. The zucchini are stuffed with chicken, carrots, celery, and a nice surprise - corn for a whole new way to enjoy buffalo chicken.
Buffalo Chicken Stuffed Zucchini
Ingredients
  • 1 lb chicken, cooked and shredded
  • 1/2 cup carrot
  • 1/2 cup celery
  • 1/2 cup corn
  • 4 medium zucchini 
  • 1/2 cup Buffalo hot sauce
  • 8 strips of bacon
  • 1/4 cup blue cheese dressing*
  • 1/4 cup blue cheese*
  • 1/2 cup cheddar cheese*
  • green onion sliced thin
Adjust type and amount of cheese and dressing to suit your tastes.
Instructions
  1. Bring a large pot of water to a boil.
  2. Meanwhile, hollow out the zucchini leaving them 1/4 inch thick, reserving and chopping the insides.
  3. Cook the bacon in a pan until crispy, set aside on paper towels to drain and reserve 1 tablespoon of grease in the pan.
  4. Add the carrots and celery and cook until tender, about 5-7 minutes.
  5. Add the reserved zucchini and cook until tender, about 3-5 minutes.
  6. Mix in the chicken, corn and hot sauce and remove from heat.
  7. Place the zucchini halves in the boiling water and boil for a minute, remove from water and place in large baking dishes.
  8. Stuff the zucchini halves with the buffalo chicken mixture sprinkle on the cheese and bake in a preheated 350F oven until the zucchini is nice and tender and the cheese has melted, about 30-40 minutes.
  9. Top with green onion slices
  10. Optional: drizzle blue cheese dressing over everything.
Recipe inspired from a recipe by Kevin Lynch
December 07, 2013
Oven Roasted Squash with Garlic and Parsley
Ingredients
  • 5 pounds butternut squash, peeled, seeded and cut into 1-inch chunks
  • 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper, divided
  • 3 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 tablespoons chopped Italian parsley
Directions
  1. Preheat oven to 375°F.
  2. Toss squash with 4 teaspoons oil, salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. 
  3. Spread evenly on a large baking sheet. 
  4. Roast, stirring occasionally, until tender throughout and lightly browned, 30 to 45 minutes (depending on the variety of squash).
  5. Heat the remaining 2 teaspoons oil in a small skillet over medium heat. 
  6. Add garlic and cook, stirring, until fragrant but not brown, 30 seconds to 1 minute. 
  7. Toss the roasted squash with the garlic and parsley. 
  8. Taste, adjust the seasoning and serve.
Recipe and photo source: Eating Well
December 07, 2013