Hunger has been my middle name for a few weeks now. No kidding. I'm feeding the "beast" with lots of meat. What's behind this hunger and how can I move beyond it? Change needs to happen. Yes, it's time to change things up again. Before I tell you about the changes I'm making, I'll talk about what's been happening.

Portrait of my food monster; image by Theresa

What's Happening

Before I first started this program, I didn't know the food plan was meat based and I didn't like red meat. I ate hamburgers from time to time at home, but I never ordered red meat at a restaurant. At my first session, Julie told me she couldn't help me like something I didn't like, so I asked about the few meats I did like: meatloaf, meatballs, cold cuts, and pepperoni. She cautioned me to watch my fat intake and indicated the meatloaf and meatballs were okay because the breadcrumbs are inside and not on top of the meat.

Over time, I have come to love red meat. I haven't felt this healthy and full of energy in years and I believe it's due to adding red meat to my diet. This past January I decided to focus more on red meats and less on poultry. A month later I started having a sweet taste in my mouth and this has been going on 24/7 ever since. Looking back now, I think my appetite increase began about the same time the sweet taste started.

I saw my doctor about the sweet taste in my mouth and I had blood tests done. No diabetes (or sign of pre-diabetes) and the rest of my numbers look great. I wondered if this could be a periodontal issue. I checked in with a friend who is dental hygienists and she suggested it may be Ketosis. (If you're interested - Wikipedia provides a good explanation on Ketosis, scroll past the medical jargon in the first few paragraphs to the sections about Diet, Diagnosis, and Controversy.)

Where to go from here? To my friends of course. I asked them for their words of wisdom on all of the above.

Words of Wisdom

My hygienists friend reminded me that Julie talks about this kind of hunger and that it's usually the body wanting something and until it gets that, hunger stays with you. I haven't figured out what it is my body is hungry for yet, but this week I'm focusing on changing up my recipes to see if I can find out what my body is craving.

I asked a few friends if they've experience this kind of hunger or if they've had this sweet taste happen to them. Here's what they said:

• When my mouth tastes like metal, I stock up on breath strips. Trying mixing in some veggies you used to eat long ago. Julie says our bodies hit a "fat pocket" that has stored vitamins, minerals, etc. from something we ate a long time ago. Our bodies have already gotten rid of the newest fat pockets, now we are into the heavy artillery from years ago and our bodies want something from that.
• I certainly know the feeling and talking about it seems to have helped me move this out of the subterranean levels of my mind into consciousness. Yesterday I ate more like a normal human being instead of a saber toothed tiger at a kill. What helps me is varying my foods and not getting too elaborate with my cooking. It seems my "imagining" what I could have, how I could make it delicious, is what tips my hunger center into over drive. So I'm experimenting with going back to simplicity - at least half the time. Roasting a turkey breast, plain broccoli, etc., seems to remind my body of the nutrition it needs, and stops all the "imagining." Eventually I get bored and spice it up a bit.
• I believe in the KISS theory (Keep It Simple Silly). Maybe it's because I'm not into messing up my kitchen!! I'm not one for sauces, dips, or cheesy things; just throw it on the grill & I'm good! Another thing I avoid is salad; too much veggies, and fat, but I love my corn, squash & carrots.

What's Next?

Good question, grasshopper!

I'm making some changes in my menu plan. I've been eating the same meats over and over. Meatloaf and meatballs are allowed on this program, but I'm eating them too often. When we eat the same foods over and over, our mind thinks we're on a diet. We're retraining our mind and giving our minds the impression that we're on a diet breaks the reprogramming we've been working on; this is not good.

I started collecting new recipes, which I'll post as I make them. I'm looking in the fresh veggie department for veggies I haven't had it a while, which is a wide range of items. Yes, a little bit of corn is supposed to be added to our foods daily, according to the plan when I started, but it shouldn't be the only veggie I'm eating. Yes, coleslaw is allowed, but not on a daily basis. I'm adding fish back into my menu. I don't know when I last had fish! I cooked shrimp for lunch on Saturday and had scallops for dinner. It's been eons since I had ribs too.

My plan for this week is to plan my meals the day before, to shop more often and in smaller amounts, and to avoid having the same meal more than once (as Julie teaches us). This means either freezing some of the meals I cook or cutting back on the amount I make. Either way, I win.

I don't know if these changes will get rid of the sweet taste in my mouth, but what I do know all of these are key concepts that I lost sight of along the way. I have more weight to lose and putting these principals back into action will help me continue on my journey to reach my goal size.

Cheating on this program is not just about eating foods that are not on program, it's also about not following the program rules. Either way, cheating slows down our weigh loss.

What can you change in your meal plan to encourage weight loss? Are you eating the same foods again and again? Is it time to switch things around? Jump in and make some changes in your menus!

Are you following the same exercise routine week after week? It's spring and it's time to get more energy into your life by switching up your routine (or starting one). Get outdoors and take a break at work for five minutes. Go to work earlier, drop your stuff in your office (or leave it in your car) and then go back outside and walk for ten minutes or a half hour. Park your car far from the office so you have a nice long walk at the start and end of your day!

Make a change today. Make another change tomorrow. Change your life forever.

March 25, 2013

I found enlightenment at the grocery store last night...

photo source: The Lost Girls

My plan last night was to buy ingredients to make two new recipes: Crock-Pot Shredded Beef Tacos and Grilled Chicken Skewers. I had my list of ingredients for both recipes in Evernote, a great app that stores all the notes I used to write on tiny pieces of paper and then could never find later when I needed them; I can access Evernote from any computer, my iPad, and my iPhone. I love Evernote!

By the time I stepped into the grocery store it was some time past 6 pm and I immediately realized didn't have enough steam to buy the ingredients or to cook up a storm. I decided I would shop like a European and just buy the items for dinner.  Plus, I'm going out to dinner tonight (Outback - which I love, love, love, now that I'm a meat eater) so it didn't make sense to buy so much food. Those recipes will wait a few more days, perhaps Friday night or over the weekend. I'll post recipes and photos after I make them.

Meanwhile, back to my shopping experience. I looked at my shopping list and decided all the items could wait a few more days and closed my iPhone. Okay, so what's for dinner? Walking along the hot section of  BigY. Fried chicken? No thank you? Baked chicken? No, I've been cooking real chicken for so long now these store bought pre-cooked chickens no longer taste good to me and I end up tossing most of the chicken. I used to eat them weekly. No other hot foods were available, so I continued down the isle to where they had all kinds of chicken wings, ready to be heated up. Yes, chicken wings will do just fine!

Next, I went into the veggie isle and I grabbed a small package of snap peas. It's been ages since I've had them. I headed over to the other side of the store, picked up a few more items, and then proceeded to the checkout.

When I arrived at the checkout area and there were three checkout options. Option one: two guys with an overfilled large grocery cart who were just beginning to put items on the conveyor belt, as someone ahead of them finished emptying their cart. Option two: eight people with small carts full of items. Option three: too far away for me to debate fast enough before someone with a large cart full of groceries stepped into that line. I went with option one.

As I waited for them to finish unloading their cart, I tried to keep busy looking at magazines, but the magazines were boring.

Sigh.

At some point, I felt as if I had entered the Twilight zone, as it seemed like their cart would never empty. It was then that I started to look at what they were buying: junk food, all junk food. I won't name names (labels), but suffice it to say there was nothing there that's on my program. Most items were large colorful bags full of crispy things and air or from the bakery. I could only imagine they are either going to or having a party, but my goodness, what a lot of crap!

The closest thing to protein was hot dogs, I saw buns and then searched to see what they were going to put in them. Oh, they had yogurt too. The kind that has a separate container on top with pebbles of toppings. Nothing in their cart was anything I used to eat, I was more of a Ben & Jerry's kind of girl.

I waited in anticipation to see their total, Meanwhile, there was finally room for me to put my items on the belt: chicken wings, 1 yogurt, 1 stick of pepperoni, 1 package of cottage cheese, and snap peas.

Cha-ching! Their total was just over $300 of junk food!

No wonder Americans have an obesity problem! Both of these guys were skinny, but I wondered what the people at the party looked like.

This morning, as I write this, I think about what my grocery cart used to look like and what others in line may have been thinking about what I was buying, which was sugar, sugar, sugar. I would switch up the place I bought dinner, so "they" wouldn't see me night after night buying Ben & Jerry's. I didn't buy $300 worth of junk food at one pop, but I certainly spent more than that in a month, little by little, one quart at a time. Well, unless it was on sale.

The chicken wings, by the way, were horrible. I should have ordered them at Pizza Palace of Granby, where they make incredible Buffalo wings for less money than the horrible wings I bought from BigY. Good thing I had that pepperoni and cottage cheese to fill the void, as most of the chicken was nasty.

Enlightenment can happen anywhere, even in line at the grocery store. My moment of enlightenment was a reminder of yet another area of my life that has changed. Ben & Jerry's used to be what's for dinner, night after night (hey, I switched up the flavor - most nights).  Today, sugar is no longer my main course, my middle name, or my first name. Sugar no longer calls me by name. I'm no longer an obese woman who spends money on junk food.

What about you? What's different in your life today than when you began this weight loss journey?

March 21, 2013

Here's an interesting video, both visually and it's content, about self-worth. Teal Scott is an amazing young woman. I looked at her of long-term goals (see below) and I wonder: what could I manifest if I invest my energies more wisely?

Teal's long-term goals: 

• Providing an alternative to the current jail system
• Owning integrative medicine facilities, where a patient’s disease is approached from multiple modalities of thought at the same time
• Setting up affordable, enjoyable "end of life centers" that assist the elderly with their peaceful, supported, holistic, non resistant transition into death
• Creating an alternative system to “pounds” for animal rescue and rehabilitation
• Providing an alternative to the current education system, which will be available to people from all income brackets
• Funding workshop tours that are evolutionary in their approach to alternative parenting methods, especially in low income areas where people would otherwise have no access to learning new ways of parenting
• Introducing programs and possibly facilities which provide affordable, healthy food to schools, jails, food banks and welfare programs
• Influencing a change in global consciousness

March 14, 2013

I tried the cauliflower pizza finally AND did not tell my hubby that crust is cauliflower....he loved it! He hates cauliflower.Too much cheese in recipe so i will adapt it next time. I used Canadian bacon, sauteed onions and mushrooms, raw slices green pepper and tomato and shredded basil. The crust looks and feels like bread-pizza crust.Next i will try steamed mussels which i have never made but need change from meat.

March 13, 2013

Nothing is happening. No weight loss. No weight gain. Plateau. I decided I'm thinking too much, so I went online looking for inspiration; found some...

source: Motive Weight

source: Pinterest

source: Sayings and Quotes

source: Dawnely Dawn

March 13, 2013

Continuing the conversations about the key concepts of Compromise and Sacrifice, these are personal stories, from my survey, about the key concept example.

image source: Each One Teach Won

(Each paragraph is a response from a different person in response to my survey.)

I made one year on maintenance; I hope this is an appropriate example for people who continue to be on this journey to the best of their ability, and that I am a positive example for following correctly.

I remember Julie talking about setting an example for oneself--for one's body. Sort of like showing it what you want it to do, exemplifying a new pattern, that it can follow. I recall being struck by how it was for ourselves. I thought of it in terms of neuroplasticity…. the habits we have fallen into have actual neuronal pathways…sort of like wearing a groove into the road during mud season. When you refuse to go into those ruts any more, and begin to carve a new pathway, new neuronal networks are created, and each time you use them they are strengthened. And as time goes on, the old pathways, ruts, can actually atrophy. So I think of setting an example is sort of like a signpost in the brain saying "This way to sanity and health"--or-- "Detour-old road unsafe - not to be used anymore," that we have to show our bodies how they can function more effectively and healthily.

By staying true to the key program, proving it works, is the greatest example and I live it daily. Being successful is a gift I can give to others. For a few days now lots of off-program foods have been on my mind, making me crazy! I even believe I've gotten bigger just because I'm thinking of them. So I'm looking within for the cause and I know it's because I get anxious when go away. I'm going away for a month and my old tapes are playing "eat for comfort." It's like having food dreams while I'm awake. Thanks to this program I won't indulge, I will do what we do for little kids: divert my attention; maybe take a cue from Jennifer and clean something!!

I remember Julie speaking briefly about example. She suggested experimenting with leaving some primo bite on the plate. At this point, I'm taking baby steps. I'm noticing, but not trying to control my appetite, or limit when and how much I eat-as long as it is healthy. That seems about as much as I can tackle for now. When I am more stable with that and I feel more confident, perhaps once I reach goal, I will take on more. Anyway, the grasshopper is very glad to have something to offer to the master.

As for example, I am looking forward to being that person who is a living testament that a healthy lifestyle is attainable.

To steal a quote from the "12 step" programs "It works if you work it." The key program works, but you need to "work it" the way it was designed. Then we can be an example of hope for those who are still hopeless. We can't pass on the gift of Julie unless we are true success stories!

When I was in Julie's third class, she said it was more than just waiting for results and calling that an example...

The example -- this is the hard one -- but I agree with Eva in how she looks at it EVERY DAY. I've practiced this lifestyle over the past 4 months (today is my anniversary day), I am setting a new example... creating new pathways for me to follow even when I'm out of the river someday. I'm getting good at not eating until I'm hungry. I am ALSO, trying to practice that even though we are ALLOWED something, it doesn't mean I HAVE to have it all the time. I now only have cheese every other day and in much less quantities. When I'm hungry before bed, I no longer eat a whole container of pepperoni. Instead, before I open the bag, I decide how many pieces I'm going to allow myself; 5 usually works. This may not sound like much of a sacrifice or compromise, but at night I used to binge eat; for me--this is example, compromise and sacrifice!! Another compromise is that even though sour cream comes with fajitas, I substitute blue cheese dressing; I'm glad I never liked guacamole. Another example I started: even though they give me tons of cheese and dressing for my steak fajita, I don't HAVE to have some with my steak EVERY bite. It feels good to send the empty steak plate back with most of the cheese and dressing! I'm trying to work up to sending my plate back with one GOOD "primo" bite left on it -- I have a hang up about feeling like I get my money's worth, when I go to dinner and think that's why I don't like leaving protein behind.

I went to a refresher today and she explained each concept:

• free will: do not weigh yourself on a scale
• compromise: meat and vegetables only
• sacrifice: never let anything sweet touch your lips
• example: the examples she used are: eat only when you are hungry and do not eat the salad before your meal

There you have it: real life examples of how people following this program are applying the key concepts of: compromise, sacrifice, example, and - I almost forgot: free will! Where would we be without the free-will component?

What's your experience with these key concepts?

Related Posts:

• Compromise
• Sacrifice

March 09, 2013

Continuing the conversation about key concepts, from my post about Compromise, here are responses from my survey about what the concept of sacrifice means. These personal stories exemplify the power behind sacrifice.

image source: Evil Mad Scientist

I was whining to myself about how others can "cheat" and seem to be doing fine: Why am I sacrificing all of that good yummy evil food, while others are enjoying it? (Well, I don't know if they are enjoying it) All of this effort when others seem to be able to have stuff off-program, but are able to do "3 hard days" and be fine! But, I am an addict. And I will sacrifice temptation.

For Julie to say up front that this was going to take SACRIFICE, that it was normal to feel cravings, and that we are going to suffer, was such an incredible relief. The biggest thing I have finally learned, not just intellectually--but in my gut, is that I can feel deprived and survive it, that I can sacrifice and be just fine. It just depends on what you want and need most. There is nothing wrong with a little suffering. I sometimes think of Olympic athletes and what they go through to get where they are. They give up a lot! I'm in training too. In training for a much better life for myself and those I love. And for that I have to give some things up. I happen to be addicted to them but they are really, really trivial.

The "sacrifice" concept has probably been the most powerful for me, and has extended to other areas of my life. In the past I always felt that someday the addictive hold of food would leave me and THEN I would be able to eat properly. All of the ads, the whole American lie that you could "eat everything you want and lose loads of weight", that you could do this and "never feel deprived" just made me feel that there was something deeply flawed about me, because I couldn't eat everything I wanted without becoming a blimp and getting sick and because going against my addictions does indeed make me feel deprived.

I've been sacrificing for 3 weeks now! Yesterday was my last 'Birthday' luncheon. I had a naked bacon cheeseburger with a side of coleslaw, water, and coffee. Friday night I celebrated with friends and had Chinese takeout and a vodka with club soda. The pay off? The weight is coming off. People have started to comment about it and I feel it. Just this morning I tried on a skirt with tags attached, which I probably bought a year ago and was unable to wear because it was too tight. Guess what? I am wearing it tomorrow. I just have to remember to cut off those tags! Oh yeah! I'm pretty darn happy!!!!

For me, sacrifice leads to compromise. I was on a vacation in CO in January and we were vacationing with friends who love to eat, and I mean EAT! Appetizers, breads, salads, entrees, desserts, after dinner drinks. In the past I ate right along with them, hence my before picture. Drinking would begin at our lunch break in the lodge and continue through the night. This time, I drank seltzer water or unsweetened iced tea during our lunch breaks. At dinner, there was no pre-meal eating. I made sacrifices to not eat along with everyone else and instead stayed on program. I watched everyone else eat the warm buttery bread. When dinner came, I savored each bite of my meal and I knew in the end I was not going to feel deprived. Nor stuffed or ashamed. For dessert I treated myself with a nice hot latte with whole milk. Never once did I feel deprived. I actually enjoyed watching others eat their desserts. For me, I see their enjoyment and I'm not gaining any weight from it. I think my success on this program is my example to others, that even on vacation--this is a lifestyle that's fits anywhere.

We all know the sacrifice we have to make to reach our goal of shedding the excess weight and getting healthy. We need to change the way we eat, plain and simple.

The funny thing is that I totally forgot to point out what my ‘sacrifice’ was during all these different celebrations. In short: I stuck with the plan the whole time. I did not have a sip of the fruity daiquiris my girlfriends so enjoyed, nor did I participated in eating the General Tso’s Chicken or those creamy desserts. Well, if you want to call that sacrifice... I didn’t suffer, believe me. I had a great time and I ate until I was full, which is a big part of this plan I really enjoy.

Never let anything sweet touch your lips.

These stories are inspirational examples that resonate with me, which is why I'm posting them to my blog, so I can come back to read them again.

How about you? What sacrifices do you make for yourself to support staying on program or maintenance?

Related Posts:

• Compromise
• Example

March 08, 2013

Last week I did a quick survey on how others apply or define these key program concepts: compromise, sacrifice, and example. A great dialogue followed. I am in awe of the complexity and the simplicity how others responded.

image (modified) source: Project Interfaith

Each of these concepts are important for us to fully understand, so today's post focuses on compromise. I'll write about sacrifice and example in the days ahead and publish those  later this week.

For me, I get compromise and sacrifice, but I always have a hard time with example. I don't get this part at all. There are others out there who are excellent examples for me to follow. Is this what she means by be the example? So many of you are an inspiration to me. I look to you as an example of where I want to be and how you got there is the example I want to follow.

What compromise means to others:

I decided, after reading some of the things people said about "cheating" that I wasn't going to eat. I was going to go clean my living room instead. I'm not hungry, so I am not going to eat. This is one of my whiny "why can't I?" moments...

Recently I had a very strong craving for junk food and I couldn't stop thinking about subs. So I stopped at D"Angelo's and bought a big, greasy steak and cheese pocket with mushrooms and onions. Brought it home, dumped the steak out of the pocket, gave the pocket to the dog and enjoyed the steak and cheese in a bowl.

Personally, I've realized that I will have to sacrifice and compromise every day for the rest of my life with my commitment to change my lifestyle.

Julie assures us that if we sacrifice the food (& drink) and do as she taught us, we will achieve our goals.

I still get to order my same meals (sandwich, chicken Parmesan, Fajitas, etc) but now without the bread/breading/tortillas.

Keep the conversation going -- what does compromise mean to you?

Related Posts:

• Sacrifice
• Example

March 07, 2013

When is the last time you did any form of exercise? If you exercise on a regular basis, are you doing the same thing week after week? Is it time to change things up and get moving in new ways? I say yes, yes it it!

photo source: Kick it Up Asana

On Monday, as I worked out on the elliptical next to Aime, she told me she's planning to do a10k and to prepare, she downloaded a 5k to 10k running app. She hasn't been running much lately, so she's starting by following the first 10 days of the program and then start from day one again. I'm impressed. I would have started with the couch to 5K app and worked my way up, but she's jumping right in there. As we worked out, I watched Aime use her app to intensify her workout. Go Aime!

Me, I kept going at my own pace and as we moved to the incumbent bike, I didn't commit to anything. But I have to say, earlier when we talked about going to the gym, I said flat out I wasn't going and within a minute I turned it around and said "Do you want to go right now (it was 11:35) or at noon?" and within a minute I was on my way to the gym. While I didn't intensify my workout, I spent 40 minutes in the gym. My recent workouts were 20-25 minutes. As I walked back to my office, I felt great and I know the extra long workout was the reason.

After my shoulder injury in Dec., I stopped working out. An injury is a good reason to stop. On the positive side here, I did walk as much as I could during my 2 weeks in Florida in Dec., but when I returned home, I clung to the injury as a reason not to exercise. When the PT guy gave me clearance to return to the gym, I didn't resume my 3-4 times a week schedule and there were weeks that I didn't make it in at all.

After my injury I told a friend I didn't think I'll be a runner anymore. She encouraged me not to toss that idea out so quickly, to just give myself more time and to give it another try. I've decided it's time to take that advice and follow Aime's lead: I'm going to run in a 10k race too. What - did I really say that aloud? Yes I did!

I encourage you to get moving too. You don't need to start by running a 5k, but it is a good  idea to have a clear goal of what you want to accomplish. Start by walking in one direction for five minutes and then walk back. Or walk to a specific place and back. Begin with a goal you know you can reach and commit to walk a specific number of days for a week. Halfway through the week, set a goal for the following week, such as  increasing your time by a few more minutes or covering the same distance in less time. Don't worry about your pace, walk the set time and increase the amount of time over the weeks and months ahead.

If walking isn't for you, find something that you can do. Stretch for 2 minutes once a day. There are online videos of exercises you can do in a chair. Try yoga. Well, I say that, but I have yet to do yoga, because I had a hard time getting to the floor or up once I got down there. My point is, find some form of exercise and make a commitment to get moving.

If you want to take off weight and keep it off, you need to exercise at some point or it's going to take a really long time to reach your goal size. Plus, once you've taken off some weight, you'll want to be more active so you can spend the rest of your life healthy!

Does this sound too overwhelming? For those of you who don't exercise yet, start today by committing to have an exercise goal that you will start on the first day of spring - March 15. The rest of us - let's look at our exercise routine and determine what we can to kick it up a notch.

So, what is my goal? My goal is to find out what 10k Aime is doing and determine if that will fit into my schedule. Plan B is to look at the running events in Western Mass and commit to a 10k run. There are a couple races in June and Sept. that I will take a closer look at. I want to give myself time to really prepare for the run and in the meanwhile have a reason to keep running. This will encourage me to run during my European vacation  in April/May. How cool will that be!

March 05, 2013

This past Thursday, a few of us got together at Roma, in East Hartford to send 2 girls off on their trips South to warmer weather. As always, Miss Emelia did a wonderful job feeding us, and as always, we had a wonderful time chit-chatting while we ate our meat crust pizza!

One of Emelia's meat crust creations

One thing that I have learned while on this journey is how to surround myself with people that make me feel good. I mean, who wants to be around depressed people, especially while we are finishing out a gloomy winter? These ladies do it for me. Everyone brings laughter, wonderful stories, smiles, etc etc and it rubs off on those who are around them.

Jennifer and Jill

Karen and Theresa

Sandy and Linda 

Susan and Chris

It is also empowering watching all of us come out of our shells, and learning how to be comfortable in our "new/old skin". The cocoon is slowly releasing each and every one of us, and we are in the thick of relearning who we are. We have all stayed the course, accepting each challenge, and embracing each obstacle as it comes, passing each "test" as an achievement.

Nights out like this, surrounded by those who know exactly what each is going through, has gone through, or who will soon be going through is very empowering. Listening to goals and challenges is always interesting ("I am going to go one more month and see where I am", "slow and steady wins the race","I am looking forward to adding fruit back in"). Knowing these women all know what I am talking about, speaking about our fears ("I don't know if I will ever be able to eat popcorn", "I am so afraid of gaining weight", "I am scared but know it is right having surgery"), is not only fun, but, I walk away knowing I am not alone. It is a way of making sure everything is ok, internally and externally!

It is neat putting names, faces and voices together! We are all so happy to see each other, hug each other, listen to each other, and eat good food, knowing that there is no judging or questioning, all the while being ourselves.

I hear Julie in my head again, louder and "refreshed" after I have been around other "Key People". Adding more support around me has only fueled me to continue on this journey. Not only does it make it easier, it has made it way more fun!

Emelia with "the gang" Thank you again!

I can't wait until our next get-together! I love you all! Thanks for another wonderful evening out!

March 02, 2013

I am having the odd feeling that as I become smaller, I will more vulnerable (to what I dont know) and less significant. Does anyone else have this sensation? It is a kind of fear that is surprising to me.

February 27, 2013

I need some feedback on this one.

Julie talked about vivid dreams, and that is sooo true!!! I have lots of vivid dreams!

I have the food dreams that I LOVE, and crazy mixed up dreams that make no sense.

But I have noticed something different. Didn’t pay much attention to these until last night. Seems like every so often I have a very vivid dream that takes my today life and mixes in real life, from the past, very upsetting moments, traumatic moments that have happened to me. We are talking troubling things that happened way in the past.

While I am dreaming I am very upset, when I wake up I am very upset and it takes me a while to get the dream out of my system.

Hmmmmm

Do you think this is my minds way of trying to get me to resort to my old methods of dealing with stress and trauma by eating? Or is it because I am 55 and starting with ‘old timers’ disease!!!

I woke up pretty upset this morning and then thought about what I had dreamt about, and really picked it apart. Interesting…

I really wonder if my mind is trying to get me to eat stuff I will NOT eat!!!

Is our minds that powerful, that smart????

WOW!! Scary!!!

I know Julie impressed upon me in classes how smart our subconsciousness is, but WOW!!!

Interesting!!

What are your takes on this??? I am really curious!! (and if you think I am loosing it, I will welcome those comments too!! LOL)

Is this happening to anyone else????

February 27, 2013

The picture below is taken in February of 2008, my last trip to Germany, and the picture above, about 5 minutes ago.  Not just the hair color changed .. J  I had trouble finding a picture from "before Julie" because I avoided the camera. I am enthusiastically continue with my journey, and now, that I have figured out how to post pictures, I will keep 'em coming. The smile on my face is genuine. I am so happy that I am losing weight again. Like many of you, I’ve struggled my whole life and been on so many diets. I love this way of living and eating and my connection with all of you. I love our support team!

February 25, 2013

     This month marks one year that I have been working on maintenance, and nothing is going to take this achievement away from me. I wanted to touch on a few things that have pushed me along on this 1 year milestone.

     First of all, this is the first time in my life that the word "maintenance" has been used for longer than 5 minutes. I achieved the use of the same word when I was with Weight Watchers, but they couldn't stop the food from talking to me, and the food won over again. I now know the power of this word. Extreme power! And there is not one food out there that is going to take this word away from my vocabulary!

     If you think of food from an alcoholics point of view, and find it in yourself to tell yourself "most food is poison", and use Julie's help, then you can push these "bad" things away.

     The MOST important thing I have been working on this year? Please read on!

     Stress will be around every corner, and I use whatever the situation is as a "test". I say to myself "I am being tested" and for the first time in my life, I am pushing through and passing these "tests"! You have to somehow find your strength to be able to say "I am being tested, and I am going to win, come out on top, not give in, push it away", then the tests become fewer and farther between. It will always be around us, these "tests". It is how one accepts the "ism"  (foodaholism, how is that?!?!?!) so that you don't feel like you failed. It truly comes from within, and the more you empower yourself, the less the food will talk to you.

     The second most important thing I have learned?

     When I go on vacation, whether it be for a night, a weekend, a week, I CANNOT, WILL NOT stray from what Julie has simply given me to use every day. It isn't as if the journey has changed because I am not sleeping in my own bed. I did that my whole life. And it got me squat! Well, what it did was get me pre-diabetes and high blood pressure. And I don't want the food to start talking to me again.

     Why?  I am a food addict!  I am addicted to food! IT IS WHAT IT IS!!!!! I would also not "drink a drink" while on vacation if I was an alcoholic. Do you think I would be able to stop at just one if I had a problem with alcohol? Would it be ok if the person I was on vacation with knew I was an alcoholic and said "oh come on, you can do it-Just one drink!" Is that ok? Not for me. I know people have said that Julie has told them "when you pack your bags, then get back on". Well, I have never heard that. In fact, I heard the opposite. At my refresher last September, I heard her say that she would never tell someone that, and she doesn't know where that came from! So, if it was said, then IT WASN'T FOR ME. Because I NEVER HEARD IT. This is part of my SACRIFICE AND FREE WILL. And why the heck would I want to cave in to something that makes me feel disgusted and guilty when I can eat an entire steak and a whole lobster if I want to?!?!?!

     This is why Julie's behavior modification plan is different from everyone else. She has been able to push the food talk away from us by giving us tools to use, and her talking to our cells. It can and does work. I know it is hard to look at other people and say "they can eat the fucking food (pardon me please, but I have thought it that way, so that is what I am going to write) SO why can't I?" Why do I have to have an addiction? Why was I wired this way? Whine Whine Whine!!!!!! I no longer do that. I smile, eat my pepperoni or my tuna, and say, Damn I Look Good in My Size 6 Levis!!!! I continue to follow this journey to the best of my ability. I say no thank you when I need to, and don't think another thought about it. My commitment is still 100%!!!!!

     My chains have been lifted. FOOD no longer controls ME.  I CONTROL IT!!!!!!!!

                     Happy One Year of Maintenance to Me!!!!

February 21, 2013

Yesterday at the hair salon something awesome happened.

“Man, you look great! You lost a lot of weight since I saw you last”. Yep, those are the words from a lady I hadn’t seen since just before Christmas. We both had an appointment last night at the same hair salon. My hair stylist was in agreement with her and we went on and on, for the next couple of hours about weight, diets, etc. Both of these ladies are familiar with Julie, not just because of me, but of a co-worker, who had lost, according to my friend, had lost a ton of weight and she kept it off for quite some time now. You know, I know I am losing weight because my clothes fit me again and I just feel it, but to hear it is just such a confirmation. Because of the blog and the support group from Facebook I feel encouraged and committed. Thank you to all of you, support group. I’ve learned so much and I continue to learn more. This is not a diet for me, but a way of living. I am not saying I will never have a glass of Wine again or a piece of cake, but for the most part, I am just fine the way things are with what I can consume. Just keep ad it each day and you will be successful.

February 21, 2013

I don’t even know how to begin this post! My SHOCK is making me shake!!

Let me explain:

I went to Savers today with my dear friend Luann. We needed to get some stuff for our upcoming trip. Luann is very patient with me, VERY patient with me!

Today I was trying on jackets and just didn’t like any. I felt fat. There wasn’t a good selection in the rack I was in, and I was just batting zero.

Luann found a whole section with lighter weight jackets so off we went. She found a really nice one and had me try it on. She told me to NOT look at the size so I didn’t. When I zipped it I thought it was to snug but she kept telling me it wasn’t. I argued, so she finally told me to go look in a mirror. I headed to the nearest mirror

I turned around to look in the mirror…

I DIDN’T RECOGNIZE THE WOMAN LOOKING BACK AT ME!!!

I started shaking and went back to Luann and she could tell I was shook up about something, so I told her that the store must have trick mirrors because there was NO WAY that was ME in that mirror.

She argued of course, and I went and looked again. NOPE, no way was that me in that mirror.

I made Luann go stand in front of the mirror to see what she saw. She went and said it looked like what she sees everyday. So I looked, and yup, sure looked like her.

So I stood in front of it again.

Much as my mind was fighting me, I had to admit it was me looking back at me.

WHO WAS THAT THINNER WOMAN!!! ME!!??? NO WAY!!!!

Luann went in the dressing room to try on stuff and she left me in front of a dressing room mirror. While she was in there I hit every mirror in the place and looked at myself. I was bound and determined to prove those mirrors wrong, but I couldn’t.

It was me looking back at me!!

WOW, OH WOW!!

Well, I bought that jacket and when I got home I put it on and told my husband to look at me. What did he see? Typical hubby, he saw a new jacket! So I yelled, NO, look at me!! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME I LOOK LIKE I LOST WEIGHT!!!

Then my dear husband says, “you wouldn’t have believed me if I did”!!

Oh, and by the way, my new jacket is a MEDIUM!!!!!

February 19, 2013

Part of this weight loss program is learning to eat a variety of foods rather than eating the same thing day after day, week after week. To continue success on my journey, I'm trying new recipes. Cooking doesn't get any easier than this recipe: add 4 ingredients to a crockpot and forget about it for 6-8 hours.

Crockpot lemon chicken with roasted butternut squash. Photo by Theresa.

I made this crockpot lemon chicken over the weekend and it was delicious! The chicken fell apart as I served up my dish. The flavor was incredible and this is now one of my favorite dishes. I modified the recipe a little by adding a half cup of olive oil with a half stick of butter (instead of a whole stick). I cooked 4 boneless chicken breasts, not the 5-6 pieces as the recipe suggests, so next time I make this, I'll cut back on the butter and olive oil.

Ingredients

• 1 stick of butter (or 1/2 stick of butter and 1/2 cup olive oil)
• 1 packet dry Italian dressing mix
• 1-2 lemons
• 5-6 boneless chicken breasts

Directions

1. Stick of butter in bottom of crock pot and allow to melt. 
2. Lay chicken in pot. 
3. Sprinkle Italian dressing packet over chicken, drizzle with lemon juice, pop the lid on.
4. Cook on high 4-5 hours, or low 6-8 hours

February 19, 2013

One of the bonuses about the way I'm eating on this program is the quiet place my mind is in relation to food. Food no longer calls my name. I've heard others say this as well. Once in a while the volume gets turned up and when it does, it's usually cheese "calling" me, but sometimes it's yogurt.

Photo source: Food Librarian

There have been times when my inner child rebels and I justify having two yogurts in one sitting. My inner child declares I just ate a ton of meat, so I can have 2 yogurts. Hello? If I ate a ton of meat--am I still hungry or am I eating a second yogurt because it tastes so good? The answer, of course, is the later.

When my inner child wins, a short amount of time after I have the two yogurts, I fall asleep on the couch and I wake up feeling hungover, as if I'd had too much to drink. This used to happen to me after I ate too much sugar, so it seems like a food allergy. This doesn't happen when I eat one yogurt, so I try to remind my inner child of this when she acts out. When she wins, I stop having yogurt for a while. Then I win!

When I have an extra yogurt, or too much cheese, I'm playing with what I refer to as "grey areas." In reality, there are no grey areas on this program. Once I came clean with myself about this, I realized such "grey areas" were the cause of my long plateaus. I'm still working on the cheese issues, but last summer I put an end to eating too much Siggi's, by implementing a couple of rules:

1. Only buy 1 or 2 yogurts at a time. The program allows for 1-2 per week and I pass my quota if I buy more.
2. Only buy yogurt on the weekend. This helps me keep track of how much I eat. 

Yogurt, yogurt, yogurt, how I love my Siggi's yogurt! As I wrote this piece, I suppressed an urge to run to the store. My "plan" was to buy an orange and ginger yogurt, put it in a beautiful dish, and then take a photo to accompany this piece. (Do you ever put yogurt in a dish before eating it? I haven't done this for over a decade.) Instead of running to the store, I turned down the volume by making breakfast (I used a photo I found online). As soon as I began to eat breakfast "communications" from Siggi's stopped.

What do you do to turn down the (food) volume?

BTW, I was on the Siggi's website and I discovered what may be the reason why Siggi's is allowed on this program: it has 2-3 times the protein count of standard yogurt.

Skyr is the traditional yogurt of Iceland. It is made by incubating skim milk with live active cultures. The whey, the water naturally found in milk, is then strained away to make for a much thicker, creamier, concentrated yogurt. So to make just one cup of skyr, with all that water going out, you need 3 - 4 times the amount of milk required to make a regular cup of yogurt. As a result of this process skyr comes out with 2-3 times the protein count of standard yogurt.

February 16, 2013

So, it’s that time of the year again. Another year older, but I refuse to look at it this way. I celebrate pretty much the whole month. Yep, I am that type of person, where’s the party? But, as we are all aware of, sometimes a little bit of overindulgence.

I remember Julie saying, when celebrating, or on vacations, sacrifice will lead to a bigger weight loss. I am proud to say that so far I am doing really good by sticking to the plan. For instance, last night in the Restaurant I wanted to order something I never had before. It was a Portuguese dish, including muscles, shrimp and pork with rice. I know that one of my favorite Portuguese dishes “Paella” comes with rice.

What’s a girl to do? I asked the Waitress, to ask the Chef if it can be prepared without the rice, and to double up on the veggies. The meal was delicious. So, don’t hesitate to ask your server. More than likely the Wait staff and Chef’s are happy to accommodate you.

I have to confess that last Saturday, dinner at a friend’s house, was more complicated. I did the best I could, but I wonder what I actually ate. We had Cheese & Crackers (I did not eat a cracker), stuffed mushroom caps. I had some of those. I am guessing there were some breadcrumbs in there somewhere, but I didn’t ask. I was hoping if I don’t know it, it won’t hurt me. There was no meat of any kind or veggies. So, I ate some cheese and stuffed mushrooms and I feel guilty and worried since.  For the main meal we had delicious roasted Turkey with veggies (she prepared Cole Slaw for me, which I love), but the French Meat stuffing had little bits of potatoes. I loved it, but was very aware of the potatoes.

Oh, I am not done yet. The party continues right through next week. I promise to be on my best behavior. My clothes still fit, so that’s a good sign. Don’t you agree? 

February 13, 2013

Blue Cheese Stuffed Buffalo Chicken Meatballs

Makes approx 6 doz party size meatballs

Ingredients

• 2 lbs ground chicken
• 1 package blue cheese crumbles (5 oz)
• 2 ribs of celery minced
• 2 T minced garlic
• 1tsp garlic powder
• 1 egg
• 1/2 cup bread crumb
• salt and pepper
• 3T  franks hot sauce

Directions

1. Mix all together and form into meatballs. Bake in 400 degree oven for 20 to 25 min
2. Sauce: mix together 1 cup of franks hot sauce and 4 Tbs melted butter.
3. Add the meatballs and sauce to a crock pot or just could toss with sauce and eat.

I haven't made this yet, but others following this program say it's divine. You'll know when I've made it because I'll add a photo.

February 12, 2013

For the past few months I've been listening to meditations by Burt Goldman. If you could use 15 minutes of relaxation today, find a quiet space and listen to Daisy Pond Guided Meditation.

February 10, 2013

Silence is Golden. Unless that silence is killing you. Before I started this program two years ago, I was dying a slow spiritual death of silent humiliations.

Friend's garden on Martha's Vineyard. Photo by Theresa

This blog includes many stories of my victory over humiliating events. Some of of those stories, and there are nearly 300 of them now, I had never said aloud, even to my close friends.

In the past few months, I've had a few "ah-ha" Oprah kind of moments that showed me a few issues I faced in silence over the years. These are a few:

• Do I dare join in the others at this party to play piñata or am I too horrified they'll be staring at my backside the whole time? A few years ago I was at a friend's birthday party and they were playing games. When they pulled out the game Pin the Tail on the Donkey, I was not interested. Yesterday I saw people swinging at a piñata on TV show. It was at the moment that I had a flash-back to the party and I realized why I didn't want to play: I was too embarrassed. Seriously? Yes! Crippled by a piñata! I called my friend yesterday to share this story with her.
• Am I being judged because I'm so large? I witnessed a woman at the airport being mistreated by airline staff and it was clear they were judging her because of her size. As I listened to her tell her daughter the story, I wondered how many times I was treated poorly when I was obese. One never keeps track of such things, but I'm sure it happened and I pushed the memory somewhere deep inside.
• Will I be able to keep up with the person I'm walking with? One of the women I work with recently reminded me when we used to walk across campus I needed to stop and catch my breath several times. I had no memory of such pauses on our walks. I do recall being mad that people walk so fast and silently wondering "what's their hurry?"

This is what I meant when I said "I was dying a slow spiritual death of silent humiliations." I wasn't trying to be dramatic. (Well, okay, it did make for a good lead into this story.) The truth is I wasn't conscious of these events when they happened. I'm happy I no longer have to think about these kinds of issues. There are many more issues I've discovered along the way that I'm happy to leave behind. A big one: when I'm boarding a plane, entering a movie theater, or walking into a classroom, I no longer wonder "will I fit into the seat?"

When I began this weight loss journey, I had no idea if this program would work for me. I had heard success stories, but all weight loss program have those. Sitting in Julie's class that first night, with 23 strangers, I had no idea that night my life would change.

As days and weeks passed, I was intrigued by what was happening to me. As months passed, and people began to ask for details of my diet, I went silent. This was a different kind of silence than the painful one I just wrote about. This silence was a positive one. I couldn't explain how this program was working or why I no longer craved the foods I had been eating that had brought me to a size 30/32. I didn't want to talk about it because it felt too personal. I told people "If I look different in a year from now, ask me what I did."

Today, wearing my size 18 jeans, I'm not silent about the program, but I don't give a lot of details unless someone really pushes. Most people don't really want the details. I tell them it's similar to Atkins. Any more details and I find myself having to defend what I'm doing. Everyone has an opinion about nutrition, what and how we should be eating. What I know today, is that the way I'm eating energizes me in ways I only dreamed of two years ago. The way I'm eating today agrees with my body. I don't need to defend that.

A year after I started this program I blogged about some of the changes weight loss brought to my life (A Year of Change, 01/25/12). There were many changes during that year and one of them was I no longer needed to promise myself "tomorrow I will start a diet." A year later, I used photos instead of word to share my progress (Two Year Progress, 01/25/12). Before and after volumes speak volumes.

Yes, in one night, my life changed. My journey isn't over yet. I have more sizes to drop and then maintenance to learn. I'm sure to encounter more "ah-ha" moments about my past life as an obese woman. This too is part of the journey. A very personal journey at that. But here I am, writing details on a web blog that (two years ago) I wouldn't share with myself or my close friends.

February 09, 2013

This inspiring article about how to get unstuck and start getting traction again is from the blog post of Michale Hyatt. After reading this, share what kind of barriers you're knocking down these days.

Photo courtesy of ©iStockphoto.com/RainervonBrandis

I often meet people who are stuck in one area of their life or another. They want a break-through, but they can’t seem to get traction.

Contrary to what they think, it’s not about having:

• More money;
• More time;
• The right contacts; or
• Better luck.

Instead, it almost always is about overcoming an invisible barrier that exists in their own head.

The barrier isn’t something external. It’s something internal—something they have created in their own mind.

Years ago, I heard a speaker talk about a research project conducted by a marine biologist. It seems he put a barracuda in a large tank. He then released smaller, bait fish into the same tank. As expected, the barracuda attacked and ate the smaller fish.

Then the researcher inserted a piece of glass into the tank, creating two separate chambers. He put the barracuda into one and new bait fish into the second. The barracuda immediately attacked.

This time, however, he hit the glass and bounced off. Undaunted, the barracuda kept repeating this behavior every few minutes. Meanwhile, the bait fish swam unharmed in the second chamber. Eventually, the barracuda gave up.

The biologist repeated this experiment several times over the next few days. Each time, the barracuda got less aggressive, until eventually he got tired of hitting the glass and stopped striking altogether.

Then the researcher removed the glass. The barracuda, now trained to believe a barrier existed between him and the bait fish, didn’t attack. The bait fish swam unassailed, wherever they wished.

Too often, we are like the barracuda. The barrier isn’t “out there.” It only exists inside our heads.

Think how many other barriers have turned out to be only mental obstacles:

• The sound barrier. Pilots didn’t think it was possible to fly faster than 768 miles an hour (the speed of sound at sea level). Then Chuck Yeager officially broke the sound barrier on October 14, 1947.
• The four-minute mile. Runners didn’t think it was possible to run a mile in less than four minutes. Then, in 1954, Roger Bannister ran it in 3:59.4.
• The two-hour marathon. Endurance athletes didn’t think it was possible to run a marathon in less than two hours. Now several athletes are on the verge of breaking Geoffrey Mutai’s world-record of 2:03.02.

The reason why most of us don’t accomplish more is because we set our goals inside our mental barriers, where it’s safe. (That’s why it’s called “the comfort zone.”)

But if you want to get unstuck and start getting traction again, you have to set your goals on the other side of the barrier. You don’t have to get crazy, but you do have to stretch yourself and push past the invisible barrier in your head.

This is the secret to achieving break-through results.

----- end of Michael Hyatt post ----

February 08, 2013

With the promise of a Winter Storm that could go down in the history books of crippling New England blizzards - what's a girl to do with an unplanned day off work? Fill a crock-pot with Italian sausages, onions, peppers, homemade sauce, and while it simmers all day, do other fun things. What's more fun than making ginger-infused Vodka for herself and a friend, even if they have to wait a few months before having a drink?

Ginger-infused vodka that I made today.

Before this program my preferred drink was a white ginger cosmopolitan. The drink had ingredients that are not on program, so I developed my own homemade version of ginger-infused vodka. I added a shot of the infused vodka to ice, seltzer, with fresh lemon and lime. Two is my limit and I never have this if I'm driving anywhere.

Ginger infused martini

And yes it's true: I named my 10 week old rescue kitty Ginger, after the white ginger cosmo. When I adopted her, 3 years ago, I couldn't decide on her name. I was making friends a my ginger-infused drink when the name came to me. Some of her fur is the color of the the skin on raw ginger, so the name seemed perfect. Later I would discover Ginger is one of the most popular of cat names and that it is most common for orange cats. Ah well, her name suits her and now I have this great story.

Now, on to my recipe...

Homemade Ginger-Infused Vodka

Today I used two 750-m bottles of vodka to see if the infusion process is shorter. Bigger bottles are cheaper, but last week I promised my Thai Place bartender friend I would make him a bottle, so the smaller bottles made sense. Before handing it off to him, I'll open the bottle to make sure the ginger has done it's magic. My nose knows when the infusion is right. How do I know? Imagine what this fresh cut ginger in the photo below smells. In a few months, when you open the bottle the aroma will be similar.

Fresh thinly sliced ginger is essential.

Here's the ginger-infused vodka recipe I made today:

• slice about 1 cup of peeled ginger into thin match sticks
• remove the lid from two 750-ml bottles of Vodka
• add the slices of ginger until level of the vodka rises to the top
• add the top back to the bottle tightly
• store in a dark and cool place for 3-4 months

How to Serve

1. Slice a lemon and lime.
2. Place half of each into a sturdy, thick-bottomed glass with 6 or 7 mint leaves (optional).
3. Muddle* all of the above and set aside.
4. Fill a cocktail shaker with ice.
5. Pour a shot of ginger-infused vodka over the ice.
6. Cap the shaker and shake for about ten seconds.
7. Pour everything from the shaker into the glass you muddled in.
8. Top your drink with a splash of seltzer.
9. Ginger infused Martini: place all ingredients in the shaker, shake ten seconds, strain into a martini glass, and then drop a thin slice of lemon rind into the martini glass.

*To muddle is to combine ingredients, usually in the bottom of a mixing glass, by pressing them with a muddler (wooden paddle) before adding the majority of the liquid ingredients. You don't have to muddle, but really brings out the flavors.

Muddler

In the past when I made this infused vodka, I bought a really large bottle of vodka (1.75L) and waited 6-9 months before I serve it. In fact, the bottle shown below is coming up to a year old; it's very smooth and flavorful. When using the larger bottle, I poured out a shot or two to make room for the ginger. I didn't measure, but I used a piece of ginger about 2-3 inches long and dropped what looked like an obnoxious amount of ginger in the bottle.

I use the smaller bottles when I give them as gifts. Summer is a good time to make some if you want to give them for Christmas presents.

This is the larger size bottle I made a year ago. You can't add too much ginger.

Regardless of the size of vodka bottle you use, it's worth waiting several month before serving. I refrigerated my first bottle I made and I do not recommend this, as it never infused. You could refrigerate or freeze it after the flavor is released to your liking, but I never have. 

February 08, 2013

So, we are having a blizzard. Everyone panicks! I get worked up and nervous too. But I noticed something with the last few bad storms we have had since I started my Key program.

The food items I stock up on are are not my past normal survival foods, and my behaviors are different too!!!

Being stuck in the house used to mean, baking all kinds of stuff. I won't make a list, but I can tell you baking during a snow storm is FUN!!!

Being stuck in the house used to mean tons and tons of snacks!! Snacking while snowed in is fun!!

WAS FUN!!!!

Now I noticed, yes I still go to the store. Why? Well, I love to watch people. I Love to see what they are putting in their carriages to help them survive the storm.

But I noticed, my carriage is alot different from theirs.

I will still have milk in it, but no snacky things. No breads, no soda, no alcohol, no JUNK!!

hmmm, what has changed.

my whole food attitude has changed. Food is not an obssession with me anymore. I still like to eat, but all that food noise is quiet! So quiet, sometimes I have to really listen to know that I should eat.

I still get excited about some foods, I LOVE shrimp and lobster. I LOVE a good steak!! That can get my mouth watering.

By focusing on all the stuff I CAN eat, I pay no attention to the stuff I CAN NOT eat. I put them from my mind, and if they rear their ugle heads, I tap them away!!

I still LOVE being snowed in and it is still fun!!! I LOVE doing nothing, I love reading, spending time with my family, watching it snow, talking to my parents in Florida as I watch the snow and they tell me how hot it is!

But the food stress is gone! No more eating as much as I can to make the storm worthwhile.

I still prepare stuff ahead of time, but it is Key friendly, not poison!

Stay safe everyone! Enjoy your time snowed in!! But most of all, enjoy yourselves in a healthy new way!! A KEY way!!!

February 08, 2013

I went shopping yesterday as I needed to get some stuff for our vacation that is coming up.

One thing I desperately needed was a new bra.

There is a store at every mall I avoid like the plague!!! I hated walking by this store! My husband would try not to let me see him looking at this store, and I would cringe every time I would see the sign.

Do you know what store would make a fat lady just want to curl up and die?

Victoria's Secrets!

I keep hearing about how they fit you for bras and their bras are so good and so on and so forth. Would never listen because no fat lady in her right mind would ever walk in there!!

Well, yesterday my friend convinced me to go in and get measured. She has told me over and over that I would more than likely fit into one of their bras. Again, my mind is saying "now way!"

Well, the next thing I know, I am in their store yesterday getting fitted for a bra!

Guess what?

I walked out of that store with one of those little pink bags announcing to the world that I had bought something at Victoria's Secrets!

Now granted, I will never never be able to wear any of their other items, no way, but I fit into their bras!

How great is that!

I proudly swung that bag as we walked through the mall!

And then, you know what?

I got two, YUP two bathing suits!

Absolutely unheard of in my past!

Especially liking them!

WHO IS THIS PERSON walking around saying they are? ME!

But that is another blog post (with NO pictures)! LOL.

February 06, 2013

The comment was posted to What to Eat" and since that blog entry is a year old, I'm posting it here so more of you will see it. Thanks Anonymous!

Apparently, Siggis yogurt is from grass fed cows. (...remember that whole "free-range" is better for us). That was why we can have Siggis and no other yogurt. I would swear, in our class I remember her saying it was the only kind of yogurt we could have. AND we had to eat it with meat.

Other food ideas:

• Taco meat on salad
• Taco meat on cauliflower crust pizza
• Tuna fish mixed w/ mayonnaise & onions or relish.
• Tuna stuffed fresh tomatoes - great in the summer.
• Zucchini lasagna (no pasta in it)
• Zucchini 'fries' and carrot stick 'fries' (baked in over in olive oil and seasonings of your choice)
• Zucchini & yellow squash sauteed with onions and a little butter.
• roasted cauliflower (w/garlic) (have also added onions at times)
• On the go - - take slices of salami, turkey, ham, or roast beef in a baggie w/ raw carrots or celery or radishes or peppers...etc
• chicken breast grilled (after marinating in good seasons dressing, teriyaki, or bbq sauce)
• chicken rolled around a bit of cheese and slice of ham... sauteed briefly on both sides to hold shape then baked (no bread crumbs. Season the outside of the chicken breasts before cooking.)

I run out of ideas too and it feels like I'm always having the same thing over and over. I am always looking for new ideas/recipes. :)

February 05, 2013

Even though I know I am down 5 sizes, I have discovered, not only do my eyes not see it in a mirror, I still am thinking like a FAT person.

Let me explain:

When I was at my heaviest:

we would go to a restaraunt, I would panic if the waitress was sitting us in a booth. I won't fit!

we went to people's houses for suppers, I would quickly scan the room and see what chair I could sit in without breaking it.

I am still afraid to go up our attic stairs as the stated heaviest safe weight on them is 250 pounds.

I am nervous about going on an airplane as I have needed seat belt extenders, and then if I am stuck in a middle seat I will overhang on the 2 outer seats!

Now I really know deep inside, all those things won't happen anymore, but it is very hard to convince my mind of it. I still try to hide in a store if I see someone I know, I don't want them to see all the weight I have gained.

It is crazy. I wonder when my mind will catch up with reality. I know I have lost weight, I see my size tags, and people tell me all the time. But my mind won't accept it.

To many years of failure, of gaining it all back, my mind won't let me see what is really happening. It is a constant battle to get rid of those 'first reactions' of the past. But I am working on it, and I am bound and determined, someday, I will see it and my mind will let me accept it!

Crazy stuff isn't it!! I had no idea how powerful our minds are until I went to see Julie!! Absolutely amazing to me!!

I have learned so much from Julie, food wise, mind wise, just absolutely mind boggling!!! But again, I am SOOO THANKFUL for her!!!

Where would I be today if I hadn't gone to see her? I can tell you, I would be a bed ridden person closing in at over 300+ pounds, on my way to dying young, to unhappy with myself to go anywhere or do anything.

So for me to fight with my mind because I can't see or accept the positive changes, well, I will take that anyday compared to where I could have ended up!!!

February 04, 2013

Turkey and Pickle Rolls

1. Spread a thin layer of cream cheese on a slice ham.
2. Place a small pickle slice near the center of one edge and roll the ham around the pickle.
3. Slice rolls into bite sizes.
4. Add toothpicks to keep them together.

 

February 04, 2013

A group of us gathered yesterday, at the New 2 You Family Boutique in Sunderland, Massachusetts, and shared an incredible array of dishes. It was inspiring to be in a room full of people who have been successful on this weight loss journey.

Group photo by our hostess Julie.

Julie and Rick were our fabulous hosts. Julie took photos of us and our dishes. I'll post the recipes and then add links to them on the recipe page. This may take some time, but I too want to have access to those recipes.

Collage of some of the photos taken by Julie.

 Here are just a few of the dishes...

Top left: deviled eggs
Top right: turkey & pickle roll ups
Bottom left: spaghetti squash (does not include real pasta)
Bottom right: squash soup with Kale

February 03, 2013